A thousand lies are told with the best intentions
by Crazycatlady89
Summary: Korra is a Senior in high school and captain of the schools pro bending team. One night she meets one of her teammates new girlfriend and they hit it off, but the girl disappears out of her life. One year later Korra is about to attend the prestigious college Teotech, and who does she bump into but the girl she has been dreaming about for almost a year? Modern/College AU.
1. Relationships aren't built on lies alone

**A/N: The story has been mostly rewritten. The most significant change for you as a reader is the change in chapters. All chapters have been cut in length which means that the initial 4 chapters now span 9 chapters instead with chapters 3-4-5 being more or less completely new. I hope you will enjoy the edited story as well as the new and upcoming chapters (11 will be uploaded one of the coming days.)**

 **Tags:** Timeskip, underage drinking, smut

 **Chapter 1.** **Relationships are** **n't** **built on lies** **alone** **.**

Asami told me she wasn't into girls at all and I was wasting my time.

I told her I did not date straight girls anyway, so she shouldn't bother rejecting me before I had even made a move.

She made a note of talking about her boyfriend all through the evening until I realized she had made half the stuff up on the spot as a sort of shield or dyke-be-gone odour spray. Like the kind you use for dogs that just can't stop chewing on your stuff.

I grew bored with her in the same way I'd grown bored back home when I was pretending to be anything but what I was.

Turning my attention back to the awful racket unfolding on stage did little to ease my boredom but at least it was something to look at.

However I feel like I'm getting ahead of myself here. It's quite rude to just jump directly to the point without even bothering with a little scenery.

It was a beautiful evening, stars littered the sky and for once clouds appeared to have better things to do than blur out the splendor of the universe. If I'd been more poetically inclined it could easily have passed as a magical evening.

As it was none of that stuff mattered at all, because I was stuck inside a dingy dive bar. The kind that doesn't check id's too closely and in return, expects their patrons to offer the same courtesy to the dust filled corners, the seldomly wiped tables and the off brand beer.

A concrete floor had been badly poured and large patches of grime sat as sticky islands amongst the many hues of overlapping blotches from spilled drinks, blood and all the other unsavory liquids it had soaked over the years.

I had cleverly disguised my identity by shedding my trusted varsity jacket as well as my wolf tails for something more appropriate for the circumstances, yet wildly inappropriate for nearly anywhere else.

My best friend had assured me that this particular get up, a high collared shirt buttoned just right to give the illusion of a cleavage, as well as a pair of skintight black jeans would make up for the lack of years on my ID. He had been right but as soon as I had ordered a beer I discretely fastened another button so I wouldn't have to worry about leaning forwards.

I stood uncomfortable under the gaze of the regulars. A pack of greasy men with grey stubbles and indistinguishable features, wearing hats of varying styles, neither of them representative of their actual professions or lack thereof. Unless the outskirts of Republic City had suddenly seen a surge in the need for cow wranglers and rodeo riders. Only the trucker caps seemed to be legit.

The tap beer was sour with a bad aftertaste that spoke of cheap hops brewed in unwashed fermentation tanks, poured slightly before it was due. It wasn't too different from the concoction my dad used to brew himself before the government cracked down on him. He framed that cease and desist order but I don't know if it made him stop because I wasn't around by then and he didn't write to tell me about it.

Or about anything else for that matter.

I was here because my so called best friend had drawn the inexplicable conclusion that his budding music career would benefit from performing live. 'To get a few under his belt' he'd said and I guess he had a point because they really needed all the practice they could get. I had reluctantly agreed to come to entertain the bass player Mako's new girlfriend, Asami, whose father had generously donated a bunch of new instruments to the band. Which in Mako's opinion warranted some special treatment as well as her own personal escort for the evening.

Which really meant fuck all as she didn't give me the time of day until the show was nearly over anyway.

Said band was currently running circles around themselves trying to plug in cords and properly align the drumset to Bolin's stubby little legs. They looked pale, sweaty and nowhere near ready to perform. I don't think I've ever seen Kuvira so frazzled but boy it was good.

Asami was eagerly texting on her phone and paying no mind to me while I slowly descended into the restlessness that comes from waiting on something awful and probably very tedious to begin.

I passed time by taking small swigs of my beer and sneaking glances at Asami.

How Mako had gotten with her was a mystery to me.

Naturally I had heard their 'endearing' story about how Asami hit him on her moped but frankly if I had been the one hitting him I would probably just have kept driving. Not because I'm gay or anything, but because Mako is really fucking moody and has quite the stick up his ass. Opal once said that he's the kinda guy you only get to know through other people, because if you met him directly you'd run screaming in the other direction. I guess Asami must've been the self torturing kind to cut out the middleman. Or maybe she just felt bad for him. A poor orphaned boy, doomed to walk the earth alone with only his supportive brother, whip smarts and model tier good looks. The kind of underdog story that really makes the eyes water in the local rotary club.

The fact he hadn't jumped down from stage and swept the beer from my hand must be something akin to a christmas miracle because I knew he certainly didn't approve of underage drinking or anything else that broke the law.

Maybe he was just acting cool for Asami's sake because the girl had her own drink in front of her, every once in a while she would sip carefully from the crusted rim and lick the excess sugar off her lips. As unlikely as it seemed she had managed to convince the bartender to make a cocktail, it didn't look that fancy but neither did anything else in here, apart from Asami herself and the gleaming lacquer on the shiny new instruments. Shit, it even had a maraschino cherry.

I wouldn't have pegged her as an cocktail gal myself, she looked expensive and clean cut and much too fancy to drink anything out of a repurposed jamjar. The only fruity thing that oughta touch those lips was the raspberry lip gloss she must've used as a child, before she grew old enough for that snazzy shade of deep red she wore now and always. I thought it made her look like a moverstar and she probably did too.

For unknown reasons the bar slowly began filling until every table was occupied. Even the unsanded shelves had someone lounging over them, picking out splinters from their shirtsleeves and eying our empty chairs jealously. I didn't think it was the usual saturday night crowd, judging by Asami's smug face and her red glowing phone I was right. A fair few passed by her to say hello or simply waved when they entered but as surely as if she had had a VIP section with bodyguards and special passes only very few of them gave her a proper greeting and nobody asked to sit. Neither did she invite anyone. A cursory glance was passed my way once or twice which I refused to react on. I'm fine being eye candy I'm not here to make friends.

The lead singer and arguably the only one with moderate talent made an awkward little jump off stage and staggered over to the table, Kuvira looked nervous but also excited, which was a rare sight even for me who had known her most of her life. If things went well tonight they'd have a small gig at the harbourside festival to look forward to and I think she was feeling the pressure.

"Just got a text from Opal, says her shift is over and she's on her way. Save her a seat Korra?" she asked.

"Will do"

Asami had finally put her phone down and she smiled at Kuvira "Knock em dead."

The singer gave her a curt nod, the standard Kuvira equivalent of a smile, "We will, thanks to you."

The heiress gave Kuvira a self satisfied grin that made me groan a little internally and turn my head so she wouldn't catch me rolling my eyes. Kuvira gave me a piercing stare as thanks, she really never was any fun.

I shifted a seat closer to Asami, letting my jacket and beer sit in front of the empty chair so it looked occupied. Asami raised an eyebrow but didn't comment. Nobody was gonna sit here anyway but it didn't hurt to be prepared.

So far we had managed to say about three words to each other, none too friendly which made me pretty sure Mako had been running his big mouth about some of the things I normally didn't speak so loudly about.

In retrospect this was perhaps the turning point of the evening because I realized that no matter what this couldn't possibly get any worse.

I undid my shirt buttons again, causing Asami to glance away awkwardly. She looked relieved when I stood up and moved to the bar. I smiled all the way up, he must've really sold me as some lesbian predator to have her this guarded.

Ordering 20 shots of Tequila and a pitcher of self serve might have caused the bartender to check the age on my id a little closer, but Opal chose that moment to appear and when Opal appears the finer details tend to blur into the background. Kuvira and I had been fighting for her attention for a while but it was really hard to compete when they lived practically in the same house.

She walked, no, Opal didn't walk anywhere. When Opal moves it is with a natural glide, like there's always a little upwind carrying her steps. Someone so graceful should have been a dancer because her way of moving commanded your eyes to watch her.

Opal picked up on my predicament immediately and pressed her body against mine in a hug "I was hoping you'd be here" She purred, pressing a kiss to my cheek. She pushed her body flush to mine and her arms lingered a little around my neck, fingers idly toying with a few strands of thick brown hair. The bartender found it hard to concentrate on the tiny numbers in front of him and slid my ID back, his attention halfway between me and Opal and the tray of shots he was already pouring.

I cringed inwardly when he sliced a lemon and placed it in a bowl at record speed and I halfway expecting them to be stained with red.

Opal gave me another slow kiss right at the corner of my mouth then took the tray of shots, lemon and salt and left me with the pitcher, bill and a dumb grin all over my face.

She took my seat while I slinked back into the one next to Asami.

Some girls just have that ability, with a wink or a tiny piece of sudden intimacy they render you totally incapable of thought or basic math. I slapped my money on the bar and hurried after her.

The heiress was eying me with mistrust, Asami clearly wasn't used to anyone refusing to serve her and took some offense to me and Opal's underhanded tactics.

In an effort to diffuse the tension Opal waved the band down, and dispensed a shot, a tawdry 'slice' of lemon and a pinch of salt to everyone.

"To the Fire Ferrets!" She proclaimed and all six of us grimaced as the cheap alcohol burned our throats. Opal pecked Kuvira on the lips and Mako gave Asami's shoulder a somewhat awkward squeeze. He was never one for PDA. In fact I don't think Mako was very into any kind of displayed affection, public or not. He'd probably been telling Asami to wait until they were married too. That's the kinda misplaced romance he would be into.

The trio took the stage and the atmosphere in the room changed to mild anticipation.

I groaned "So it begins" and handed out another round of shots, alcohol was going to get me through this, one way or another.

Six awful songs later I was getting pretty tired of hearing Kuvira sing about broken hearts and all the other emo shit Mako had word vomited on his paper during their one solitary song writing session. The shot tray was empty and a very tipsy Opal had taken to the floor where she was swaying and making googly eyes at Kuvira.

What a lightweight.

Asami had that self satisfied content smile on her lips again and I knew then that this girl, for all her beauty knew nothing about music.

Even so, when she looked at me she looked pretty bored as well so maybe I shouldn't be so quick to judge.

"He's pretty good on that bass huh?" I lied in an effort to break the ice between us.

"He'll get better." She sounded quite sure about that. "He really puts effort into everything he does."

"That's our Mako, he's like mister effort. Never takes a day off."

"Sounds familiar." She said and I thought she sounded kinda sad, but it could have been the alcohol. In fact I was pretty sure that it was, Asami hadn't held back either and when I really looked at her her eyes seemed somewhat unfocused. "So what's the deal with those two." She pointed at Opal and Kuvira, the latter was on her knees, singing directly to Opal whose hands were resting on Kuvira's thighs rubbing them in a rather salacious way.

"They starting dating a few years ago, give or take. The two of them have been in love with each other since we were children."

"Oh." She frowned. "It's just… From the looks of it I thought she was into you. You seemed really friendly before." She said that in the most non-committable way possible and I recognized the sentiment behind it, fucking Mako and his big blabbermouth.

I shrugged. "It's not as easy getting served as a minor in here if your name isn't Sato. It was just a distraction. But now you mention it yeah, there used to be something, that's why it took so long for them to get together. We kept getting in the way of each other until I just backed off."

Asami nodded a bit longer than what was necessary. I wasn't sure she'd heard a word I just said.

"Mako never knows when to back off. I tried taking him to see my dad and he was just… He basically didn't stop pushing until dad had to admit he wasn't such a bad person. It was really impressive."

"Mako doing something impressive?" I scoffed "Well I guess there is a first time for everything. If only your dad could have bought him some songwriting lessons instead."

Much to my surprise that made Asami laugh.

"I'm gonna get another round of shots, you want anything?"

She shook her head. When I got up and the blood rushed to my head leaving me a bit unsteady, I hadn't planned on getting drunk but I figured it was better to ask forgiveness than permission. My guardians would probably be in bed when I got home anyway, and my parents were living halfway around the world, not that they would care either way.


	2. We need more lies

**A/N: The story has been mostly rewritten. The most significant change for you as a reader is the change in chapters. All chapters have been cut in length which means that the initial 4 chapters now span 9 chapters instead with chapters 3-4-5 being more or less completely new. I hope you will enjoy the edited story as well as the new and upcoming chapters (11 will be uploaded one of the coming days.)**

 **Chapter 2: We need more lies.**

Around their 10th song they began playing covers and I was just about bored enough to think that they might actually be good at it, either that or the tequila had begun taking its toll.

Getting Asami to shut up about Mako had been something of a task so I collected Opal for a little distraction.

We had done several body shots off each other in an effort to upset Kuvira and it appeared to be working. The normally straight laced frontwoman was staring holes through us as Opal licked the salt of the hard ripples of my abdomen.

I noticed Asami watching and pushed my luck "Hey 'Sami, you wanna do a body shot and make loverboy over there lose his shit?" I slurred giving her a barely coordinated wink.

She threw me a pointed stare.

"I'm not into girls Korra, you are wasting your time."

"Well I'm not into straight girls so you are wasting your time telling me that. Besides I'm not hitting on you so don't flatter yourself." I said in an attempt to nurse my wounded pride.

She clearly hadn't been prepared for that answer "I'm going outside." She grabbed her purse and was out the door before I could react.

Mako looked at me and raised his eyebrows, gesturing for me to go after her before she could leave. I grumbled a bit but followed her.

The first thing that really struck me as odd when I got out was the fire.

The raven haired beauty had a plain silver zippo raised to her face and she was lighting one of those cigarettes I never seen nobody but pimps smoke before. The kind that was thin and excessively long, I always imagined it was for people who enjoyed the habit of smoking but really disliked having that habit satisfied with actual nicotine.

That Asami Sato of all people would chose to buy a brand of cigarette that effectively gave you half the tobacco for the same money as a full pack was however not very surprising.

At some point during the last three cover songs or perhaps the last three shots of tequila I had given the driver seat to my drunkenness and now I found myself asking her if i could bum a smoke off her in spite of never actually smoking before.

She seemed reluctant but agreed.

"You didn't have to chase me out here." She said as she lit the cigarette.

"No. But Mako was giving me the stink eye and I do kinda feel bad about how I have been acting tonight."

Asami nodded "Me too. He just… Told me all these awful things about you, that you played with your friends love lives and got in the middle of everything."

I waved her off "That's how he sees it, but the truth is a lot more complicated than that you know. It wasn't easy for any of us to figure out who we wanted to be with. I guess Mako just always kinda thought it was Kuvira and Opal who were meant to be. It wasn't always like that though… Fuck I don't even know why I am saying this. You're a fucking Sato you probably always had anyone you wanted."

Asami frowned "Money doesn't buy love Korra."

I grinned sheepishly "No I guess not. Either way. There were times when I thought it was supposed to be me and Opal, and even me and Kuvira. It just never happened like that."

"Only gays in the village huh?" Asami jested.

"Pretty much."

"What about you though?" I asked Asami.

"I'm not gay."

"No shit sherlock, I meant Mako. Why him?"

She shrugged, "He's a nice guy."

"Yeah and about as animated as a surfboard."

For the second time this evening Asami gave a genuine laugh. I found that I rather liked the sound, like it was making tiny bells throughout my body ring.

"I don't know. He just makes me feel safe,"

"That's what he does. Makes you feel safe until you don't have any room to move or stretch." I realized how bitter that must have sounded, "Ah, I'm sorry that seemed kinda underhanded."

"Sounds like you know from experience."

"He didn't tell you?"

"Can't say he did."

I rubbed my neck awkwardly. Asami ditched her butt and tore her eyes from the black on black spectacle of the dimly shrouded city stretching some bit into the distance. She glanced at me and I found it pretty hard to lie with such piercing green eyes staring into mine.

"It was a brief thing really. I had a hard time after the whole Kuvira and Opal thing. He was just sort of there."

She averted her eyes "...He does seem like the kinda guy that is just sorta there… Doesn't he?"

I wasn't sure what the question was implying so I just sighed "Yeah."

Inside the bar things appeared to have taken a turn for the worse.

Mako looked agitated and was having a hard time keeping the pace of the song causing several rude attendees to boo and toss their cup coasters at him. I could see Bolin telling him something to get him back on track but it was hopeless. Once they had painstakingly squeezed out the last notes of the song Kuvira notified the audience that it had been the last. The applause seemed genuine but perhaps it was less of an accolade than a sign of relief.

The string of slightly over the top love songs must have done their number on Opal because she pulled Kuvira into a steaming kiss while Mako and Bolin began hauling their gear into Mako's truck.

I glanced at Asami and saw her blush but she quickly gained control of it and turned her eyes to the boys, clearly faking her enthusiasm at watching them work.

My tequila driven brain chose this particular moment to make a liar of my mouths previous statement and say something completely out of line.

"You can look you know... half the room is." I dipped in a little closer "Even a straight girl is allowed to think it's hot when two girls kiss, especially those two." I purred so close to her ear I could feel the warmth of her skin. Tiny goosebumps appeared there and I could all but feel the tremble of her body next to mine.

Asami leaned backwards to create some distance between us, an action that gave her a good look through the much too open buttons of my shirt. I had forgotten to close them again and the sight caused the flush on her cheeks to deepen until it was a near match for her lipstick.

I twisted my body to give her a good look "How's that straight girl thing holding up now?"

"About as good as your ability to stay out of other peoples relationships" she said earnestly. I gave her a very insincere apologetic smile and leaned back to smooth out the crinkles.

"I'm sorry. You are just not what I expected. I couldn't help myself."

"What did you expect?"

"Rich little daddy's girl, eager to slum it with the kids from the bad side of town."

Now it was Asami's turn to look kinda sheepish, "I guess that isn't so far from the truth."

I leaned back in, "One thing I learned growing up poor is that everyone wants something. It's not a bad thing it is just human nature. When you meet someone new it takes a while to grow past that but it is possible."

"That's very insightful for a jock."

"Isn't it just? Concussions are the fast route to enlightenment."

Asami laughed again and this time my insides lurched pleasantly at the sight of her eyes crinkling and her smile revealing perfectly white teeth. It made me think that she didn't smoke normally.

"You can't be a regular smoker. Your teeth are too gorgeous." I blurted out.

Asami didn't stop smiling this time even though some of the light went out of her eyes "I'm not… My mom was, it sounds really stupid but sometimes it just makes me feel close to her, to do something she would do." Her eyes glanced to Mako for a second and I felt a pang of sympathy for her. I wanted to reach out and squeeze her hand but I held myself back.

"I get it really. I always wear blue because it reminds me of home. It's been nearly 5 years since I saw my parents and I miss them you know? Even though they did horrible shit to me I just…" Why was I telling her that?

Asami must have noted how the admission made my face scrunch up because she reached out and squeezed my hand, making me feel kinda bad for making such a big deal out of a tiny gesture just a minute ago. I noted the smoothness and gentle warmth of her hand and it comforted me.

"I'm sorry"

"S'not your fault Asami. I'm just a little drunk and emotional apparently."

"It's funny really, when you came to my school for the game a year ago you seemed so collected, I would never have pegged you as a sad drunk."

"I'm surprised you even remember me."

Asami blushed, her eyes seeking mine.

"You are pretty hard to forget."

Her thumb caressed me gently and I felt my throat go completely dry.

As on cue our attention was drawn by the approaching figures of Mako and Bolin. Asami dropped my hand and had the decency to look just a little guilty. Mako scowled.

"Kuvira and Opal went home. We can drive you guys if you want." He said.

 _Way to treat your date._ If Mako was ever going to have a girlfriend for real he'd need some serious lecturing on how to be affectionate in public. Starting with the courtesy of recognizing that your girlfriend was something more than a slight inconvenience.

I hoped Asami would decline their offer but the girl clearly hadn't missed her lecture on proper girlfriend behavior and stood up. "You coming Korra?" She asked, I almost fooled myself into thinking she sounded hopeful.

For a moment I scanned the bar looking for anyone, just anyone to take home and fuck senseless so I could forget about wanting to steal the girlfriend of a close friend. I am not sure if I was delighted to find nobody interesting or disgruntled. "Sure. I'll be right out."

When we jumped into Mako's busted up truck, I couldn't help but notice that in spite of leaving nearly ten minutes ago Opal and Kuvira were still parked outside the bar, the windows of the truck had steamed over but I could just about make out Kuvira's head pressed against it. I won't say it made me jealous but I still felt a pang of unhappiness thinking about it. Our past was pretty complicated but it was hard not to feel bad about coming between something that was just so right once it was allowed to bloom and reach its peak. Not that I would peg myself as much of an optimist but there was just something about them that made me feel like they were the exception to the saying I had come to consider almost a rule; Love always ends.

Asami must have noticed them too because she squirmed noticeable. I couldn't feel it myself because Mako had conveniently, and I imagine quite deliberately, placed himself between us on the cramped front seat, but I could see her discomfort nonetheless.

Mako and Asami broke up a week later and I didn't see her for almost a full year.


	3. The lies that separate us so

**A/N: The story has been mostly rewritten. The most significant change for you as a reader is the change in chapters. All chapters have been cut in length which means that the initial 4 chapters now span 9 chapters instead with chapters 3-4-5 being more or less completely new. I hope you will enjoy the edited story as well as the new and upcoming chapters (11 will be uploaded one of the coming days.)**

 **Chapter 3: The lies that separate us so.**

 _Mako and Asami broke up a week later and I didn't see her for almost a full year._

The rest of the year seemed to breeze by, carried on a whimsical wind or a quiet monotonous flurry.

Events blurred together and nothing really seemed to keep me in the moment.

Everything seemed awfully boring and predictable. Train, eat, sleep, finals. Then we got into our colleges, or some didn't.

I never appreciated how freeing it is to be part of a system. You go to highschool, you have finals, studying, 'fun' events planned by the 'adults' and always someone or some tradition telling you what direction to go. At the time it seemed like hell but I think that was only because I never carried the responsibility of freedom and felt it's crushing weight.

A little luck and and a shitload of early morning training sessions landed me a scholarship to Teotech, the fancier of Republic City's two universities. It was more than I asked but less than I could have hoped, since I didn't get the single room I had pined after. You have to understand that in spite of my laissez faire attitude to life I always had pretty high expectations of the lengths people would go to for my sake.

I don't know what I thought about going there and I still don't. Things were a bit too hectic for introspection so I just tried my best to get by. The benders were good, classes hard and people here paid good money not to get smothered by regulations. It's not the kind of school you would send your kids too if you expected them to be disciplined, but then again earth kingdom had plenty of those around and the dean of students here really wanted to do things differently. He threw around the term urban environment like it meant something, which I really believe he thought that it did. I personally think it's better to stick with making the mistakes you know how to fix like lazy RA's and the occasional frat party gone out of control, instead of making all new ones. Maybe I'm just not idealistic enough to think a bunch of late teens know how to handle themselves without the threat of a narky RA breathing down their necks.

Mako and Bolin got their scholarships too, but they had to settle for Republic City Community College. It marked the death of our little trio even if we didn't talk about it like that.

There were a lot of assurances going around about staying friends forever. About how much we'd be see each other and hang out for their band practices.

About college gigs and groupies and how much publicity I could get them at Teotech.

Crowds, fans, a lot of idle last-minute dreams being thrown about.

Maybe it is just human nature to go all-in before you lose instead of being perfectly rational about it and just admitting to each other that some things just end and we don't always get to choose how.

Bolin took a musical route that he changed to business within the first semester. I never knew he had a knack for it but I guess he had been selling the Fire Ferrets as a band for a few years so he had some experience in surmounting the impossible. Mako stuck to his guns and took criminology.

At first Bolin pleaded with me to reconsider my choice but my heart was set on Teotech and neither him nor Mako could persuade me to switch. I didn't much appreciate them trying either.

I know they were just trying to keep our team together but I had seen Teotech's benders and frankly I wanted to be with the best, not drag myself through tryouts only to be given a reserve spot or something similarly insulting, like junior varsity. If RCCC wanted me to go there they would have to make me a better offer.

Our friendship took a blow but it was due time we grew up and out of those fantasies. I always thought that true friends can survive anything, time or distance doesn't matter.

Summer break had been the hardest since coming to Republic City. My new team demanded daily practice so we'd be in shape for the early season. I hadn't even started school yet and already I was becoming familiar with campus, my roommate didn't arrive until a few days before lectures started either. It was a blissful six weeks, I never had privacy before.

When i finally got around to see the others I was disappointed to see that Kuvira and Opal didn't hang around much after she split up the Fire Ferrets. I swung by them a couple of times during summer break but mostly they seemed too preoccupied with each other to be any fun.

The one day we went to the beach together she slammed a volleyball hard enough into my face to give me a bloody nose, instead of apologizing she laughed like a sadist cunt and we didn't hang out at all after that, at least not until the semester closed in.

Opal called me at some point to say that she thought Kuvira's aggression was about neither of them had getting a scholarship. It didn't really matter as the Beifong family had more than enough to pay for both of them she said, but even so Kuvira took it as a blow to her pride that she hadn't been offered anything worthwhile.

We talked for hours about all the things that had gone unsaid since High School ended, it's incredible how much drama you can really cram into just a short few months.

I was surprised to learn that Kuvira had been reluctant to accept Suyin's offer to pay her way through Teotech. In my opinion it was because she was stubborn and had all kinds of high opinions about herself but I had more sense than to tell Opal that even though it was damn tempting.

Honestly I couldn't be happier to have someone there I knew. Even if they did live mostly inside their own bubble of perpetual fucking happiness. It's not like I had any other friends from the good side of town. Everyone I'd grew up with had the brown caked collars from the dust storms that swept over the lower reaches of Republic City where people could usually get by on the cheap. People from the lower reaches didn't go to Teotech.

I found Kuvira's make-it-on-your-own spirit really tedious at times, but I guess she never really learned to appreciate how good she had with the Beifongs compared to other kids in foster care who would gladly had gone to college even if it was community. Shit most of them would be happy for a three week sculpting class just to feel like they belonged somewhere. Not that I am one to talk about foster care, I never got tossed around between families like she did.

Kuvira chose Law and Opal went into Medicine. Being a non bender, even being a non waterbender was usually enough to disqualify you from becoming a doctor but her mind was made up and I think it made Suyin rather proud to see Opal go against the stream like that. She had always expected 'great things' from her kids, even if it was pretty difficult figuring out what she meant by that and by extension what Suyin thought counted as great.

"Are you about done Korra? I can hear your mental cogwheels turning all the way over here."

Kuvira lowered her pen and stared glassy eyed through the panoramic window. Teotech Towers was all windows and highly polished at that, making it a bit of an eyesore on the otherwise flat, old fashioned part of town. The Sato family had 'generously' donated curtains, marquees and a enormous solar sail to help cover every southward window in the lecture halls and drown out the glare of the sun reflected on the towers surface, a small effort to make reparations for the gross oversight.

The metalbenders eyes held that version of a thousand yard stare especially reserved for law students. Like she was trying desperately to place herself somewhere far away from the pile of homework on her desk. Perhaps she was remembering happier times before she was forced to read 50 pages of nonfiction a night and could cuddle up to Opal with a cheap Sci-fi novel like she used to. Now she looked more like she was counting sheep than wondering if robots dreamt about electric sheep or live action ones. The answer is that robots do not dream by the way. Kuvira seemed miles away, somewhere between desperately wanting a good nights sleep and her refusal to read only the bare minimum. Though I didn't think you'd ever see Kuvira look desperate when she knew someone was watching her.

Which I was, much to the chagrin of Altair who missed a jump by inches and fell down, alerting every guard in the vicinity of my less than noble intentions to throat stab their master. I yelped with surprise and Kuvira shot me an angry glare for pulling her out of her revérie.

"Do you ever do any actual work or do you just play that game all day?" She eyed the perfectly innocent Playstation at my feet with thinly veiled contempt.

"Hey. I work better at night."

"It is night."

"Tomorrow night I meant."

I winked at her and she scoffed but I noticed the hint of a smile on her lips.

Opal was lounging in the heavy armchair clutching a thick book, a picture of a man with half his skeleton exposed on the outside. Her clothes were in wild disarray from the post lecture romp she had with Kuvira and she was frantically chewing on a pencil while her eyes skirted the words on the pages at a ludicrous pace. Kuvira watched her for a moment before turning her attention back to her work.

The way Kuvira looked at her girlfriend made my insides purr pleasantly, I don't think I've ever seen anyone look at another human with such adoration. I already said that I really believed in their love but I think it stands to be repeated a few more times. They gave me hope that love could be more than sexual compatibility or a best friend sorta thing. It didn't stretch far enough to make me believe in soulmates, but if I had believed in such a thing these two would have been my go-to example.

Since moving in with them I'd learned that Opal's sexual appetite was pretty insatiable, to be frank I was kinda surprised they hadn't invited me into their room for a threesome yet. But I remained cautiously optimistic.

Maybe Kuvira was against it because I sure as hell didn't think Opal would be. Since the start of the semester things had evened out between us. I think the metalbenders ego was pleasantly pleased that she was top of her class and I was barely scraping by, it leveled the playing field to a pleasant stalemate. I had certainly learned a lesson about hurting her pride that I wouldn't soon forget.

"Easy there Vira. I can feel you fucking Opal with your eyes from over here," I said over my shoulder.

Kuvira shot me a glare but Opal laughed heartily.

"She fucked me plenty already thank you Avatar."

The non bender winked at me and we shared a grin.

Objectively Kuvira was a much harder worker than I was, she had definitely deserved the scholarship more. Nothing I could do about that now though. Fact of the matter was that without it I would be stuck with RCCC and Kuvira ended up here anyway. She should've been happy for me but her fucking pride had it's own say in the matter.

Some time during my enrollment the Dean of students, a slimeball named Raiko, had given me a special celebrity tour during which it was subtly hinted that they only wanted to give one scholarship for a female pro bending athlete and he had chosen the Avatar over some random but arguably skilled orphan.

I wanted Kuvira to know but I wasn't sure if it would make things better or worse. I knew she had her insecurities about being glossed over by authority figures, most foster kids do. Especially those taken in by Suyin, a woman who in spite of her loving nature was rather notorious for being preoccupied with her own interests, so I really didn't feel like feeding into Kuvira's issues on that account. Arguing that things had ended up for the better like this probably wouldn't do much in the way of nursing her wounded pride. So I kept my mouth shut and tried my best not to gloat.

Whatever qualms she had with me, it was better to let her work them out herself.

I hugged Kuvira from behind and she flinched at the gesture. It wasn't unusual for me to do that but to her, any intimacy was something that caused pause then delicate processing before she accepted it. Even when Opal did it. "Hey. I'm sorry Vira." I whispered into her neck, loud enough for Opal to catch, the non bender lifted her head and watched us with peaked interest. Kuvira relaxed into my touch. "I know how much pressure you're under. Want me and Opal to take the edge off… and make you dinner?" I intentionally lingered a little before adding that last part.

Her lips curled into an infectious smile, "That would be lovely, as long as Opal does the actual cooking. I still don't trust you with the stove."

I kissed behind her ear and threw a look at Opal. She looked hungry but maybe not for food.

I couldn't help but push my luck a little and gently knead Kuvira's neck and shoulders. The tension in the muscles dissipated under my strong fingers.

Kuvira rewarded me with a content sigh. It was all I could do not to let my hands wander.

Opal got out of her chair and replaced my fingers with hers. "Why don't you get started in the kitchen? I'll take over here." Her pupils were very dark.

I grinned, "as you wish Opal."

The non bender leaned down to whisper something into Kuvira's ear, but I was already too far away to hear.

I could feel their stares on me as I made my way to the kitchen. My confidence soared and I did my best not to walk too quickly, tonight could be really interesting.


	4. The lies we tell for other people

**A/N: The story has been mostly rewritten. The most significant change for you as a reader is the change in chapters. All chapters have been cut in length which means that the initial 4 chapters now span 9 chapters instead with chapters 3-4-5 being more or less completely new. I hope you will enjoy the edited story as well as the new and upcoming chapters (11 will be uploaded one of the coming days.)**

 **Chapter 4: The lies we tell for other people**

I woke up when Kuvira accidentally elbowed my face. I wouldn't have pegged her as a restless sleeper but the stinging of my eye socket was all the evidence needed to the contrary.

It hadn't been part of the plan to stay in their bed after we had sex, but it probably didn't make much difference either. Neither of them looked like cuddlers and I'd been positively knackered. The bed was the wide king size kind and it's purchase had been awfully hard to explain. For all the roguishness of her own character Suyin did tend to think of her daughter as a pure even innocent, soul.

I stretched my sore muscles, feeling utterly content at the events of the previous night. This wasn't the first time I felt truly grateful that Kuvira and Opal offered me a room in their apartment but certainly the most sincere.

Last night had been really special.

In spite of all our flirting and awkward teenage makeouts I never went all the way with either of them, there had always been that lingering curiosity though. The reality thankfully turned out better than the fantasy.

Kuvira was taking up most of the bed and Opal was balled up beside her, the contrast in their sleeping position was utterly adorable. I gently eased the kinks out of my sore and bloodless arm then went to the bathroom to prepare for team practice. Even saturdays weren't sacred here, normally something of an annoyance but today I didn't mind the excuse to leave before things had a chance to get awkward.

Looking down on the sleeping faces of my two best friends. I vowed that no matter what I wasn't going to let this get between them even if I had to move out. I was certain that our friendship was strong enough to handle it, otherwise I wouldn't have gone along with it, okay pushed for it, if I have to be honest. If a single threesome could pry these two apart then I'd probably lose whatever rocky faith in love I had been hoarding over the past two years of watching them together.

I reached down and brushed Kuvira's hair from her face. They would be fine.

The apartment wasn't grand by their standards but positively mansion-like by mine, it had a spacious common area with a few desks crammed in at odd angles, a large couch with a matching chair and a tv set with a neat row of Opals favourite consoles. The bookcase was dark wood and held an assortment of tattered dime novels; Kuvira's, and games of every kind; Opals. The metal clan banner took up an entire wall and the other opened onto a narrow balcony that wrapped the entire length of the place. Most importantly it had floor heating and no matter what corner I looked at there was no pile up of dust like at the Caelum's or worse tumbleweeds of white fluffy hair to remind me of home.

How those two managed to keep their relationship a secret was beyond me, but knowing Suyin I thought it was pretty wise of them to do so. She could be very unpredictable and seemed like she relished in creating drama just for the sake of it.

They only needed one bedroom and I was happy to take the spare. I never had one of my own, even if it was technically Kuvira's. It saved me from living in the dorm with that fuckhead Lujan, I caught him standing over my bed, dick in hand, on my first night and I'd stayed here ever since.

Lujan developed a permanent wheeze after I punched his dick into his throat and honestly who could've slept in such a racket? It was worse than Naga when she got a new chew toy. Lujan certainly didn't do trench battles and neither did I so I withdrew before we could even wind up for a good fight. He was a pudgy 18 something kid with glasses and an addiction to erotic cartoons of such kinds I never even knew existed, that kept him up all night masturbating under the crustiest blanket I've ever seen in my life.

I saw him on campus once or twice but he never made eye contact and he usually scrammed as fast as his laboured breathing would allow. Coed rooming was about the stupidest idea I ever imagined and this place was just full of stupid ideas. Unisex showers for the pro benders being the second worst. If I caught Tahno staring at my tits one more time I'd bend him a permanent dickcage out of tile and it wouldn't be roomy.

The only problematic thing about living with two other girls turned out to be closet space but somehow it worked out, I didn't have much stuff anyway and really it wasn't anything to complain about, especially not since Kuvira wasn't beneath lending me her clothes. I'd gladly have tossed half of my possessions anyway for the relative peace and quiet of living with a pair of hormonal teenagers, it couldn't be worse than anything I'd seen in the dorms. And their fucking was at least pretty hot to listen to in comparison to Lujan's heavy breathing and creepy mutterings. That whole respectable rich kid deal didn't hold a lot of water once you saw how sloppy these brats could be when they didn't have their maids picking up after them. They were painfully ordinary teenagers which is to say disgusting and spoiled.

I'm pretty sure Kuvira was actually kind of annoyed at my presence but apart from the occasional nagging she didn't say anything about it. After last night I hoped I had swayed her opinion a little in my favor though. Opal and I had definitely done our best to make her center of attention and judging by the angelic expression on her sleeping face it must have worked.

After my normal morning routine of sloppily brushing my teeth and a quick seven minute shower I headed to the kitchen to whip up a batch of scrambled eggs and vegs. Normally I had a bowl of oatmeal with banana and peanut butter but today called for something special. Nine cracked eggs later I burst back into Opal and Kuvira's bedroom with a loud call of 'Gooooood Morning' followed by lots of groaning and threats to my safety, which thankfully were apologized for once they realized that my annoying wake up call was followed by breakfast in bed. I smugly said goodbye and headed out for team practice.

I felt happier today than I had in a long while and the first few hours of the day passed in a content blur. Even if earthbending a disc into Chen's face did sober me a bit, she was usually a pretty good sport about things like that though. Our team captain did his best to make me feel bad about it but I'm happy to say that for once my temper stayed in check and even his passive aggressive jabs couldn't phase me.

"Hey Avatar! Try watching the fucking rocks you throw, if that had landed you would have gotten us disqualified in a real match."

I ignored him and turned to Chen, the firebender had redirected my attack easily enough, so really, what was the big deal?

"You okay Chen?"

She nodded without dropping her stance and I slipped back into mine. Her hands opened and closed in tune with her sway. I'd never seen her get tripped up by anything. Tahno was doing his annoying eel move, waving his arms about like a wacky arm flailing tube man. I really wanted him to be awful but he wasn't. Clumsy looking, arrogant and so good it made me irrationally angry.

A few moves later Tahno tripped me with a nasty move from behind me, a hosing foul by any account. Chen cocked an eyebrow but kept quiet.

Tahno was a swirly haired douchebag who never once shut up about his 'outside connections' and how 'he'd basically already been drafted for a professional team' just don't ask which one because it was all very hush hush. Unfortunately for us he was the captain which in his own, very much not humble, opinion gave him a bit of a free pass to act the resident asshole.

The last bender on the team was the scrawniest little firebender I've ever laid my eyes on named Chen. Whom I liked as far as anyone could like a person that never said a damn word.

They called her the Firecracker and she was arguably one of the best firebenders I've ever seen, all fluid movement and graceful jabs. Her body never stood still but the sheer control she had over every move made her appear much slower than she actually was. Like she'd learned everything she knew from a waterbender and transformed it to her own element. That could easily have been the truth but she never spoke so I was left with my own imagination. I pictured increasingly more ridiculous stories about her background, my new favourite was that she was secretly raised by a rare arctic firebending cult that worshipped Tiger seals. Of course she had left for political reasons but not before casting down the enigmatic leader and freeing her people from the yoke of religious oppression.

Tahno's consistent condescending rants about this or that kept the practice going on forever and it was late afternoon by the time he decided that there was no possible way he could make me feel worse about my mediocre performance.

I guess the coach could have put me on another team but Tahno and Chen where the top seeded benders in their categories and he didn't wanna risk losing the gold to RCCC like last year. With us he was hoping for a winning combination. It's not uncommon to spread out the talent a little and give yourself more chances to win but not this year. Rumor has it that RCCC had a new star team and Coach Lin wasn't taking any chances.

After a gruelling six hour training session I finally dragged myself through the lobby and into one of the many lifts.

The electronic kind worked by wire, counterweights and pulleys not the earthbending kind you'd normally see around the Earth Kingdom continent. If Republic City could even be thought of as earth kingdom anymore. The details on that was rather fuzzy since the Earth Queen abdicated in favor of smaller regions with a decentralized government. At least that was what we'd heard. I've never known a monarch to give up her throne but she must've had a reason.

I managed to drag myself onto the couch and fall asleep without missing a beat. When I woke up it was to the sound of a high pitched overly excited Suyin making her grand entrance. Her wide stance balanced out the comically outstretched arms as she practically danced through the door. I swear to fucking god this bitch must have grown up in a theatre because nobody sane holds themselves like that outside of grossly overacted school plays.

"AHH! Korra is here!" She said, sweeping inside and flinging herself through the guard of my horrified expression and stiff-as-a-board body language to land halfway on top of me. She then roared with laughter at the strained hug I gave her and planted a audible smooch on my cheek. Opal's eyes were mirthful as she tried to hold back her laughter and even Kuvira looked thoroughly amused, happy that I'd done my part and acted the convenient distraction.

Suyin presence was a bit of a irregular occurrence and as always took me a little off guard, I liked her, over the top as she was. But there had never been anyone quite like her in my life and I wasn't fully equipped to deal with someone so animated. When Suyin walked into a room she became the room. It's kind like how the moon's gravitational field is so large even though it's vastly smaller than earth. She was just one woman but one thing I knew for sure about Suyin is that she always pulled the tide with her. I don't know if that is too obscure or difficult to understand but think of it like this. The tide can be a killer but it also helps a helluva lot of people who live in otherwise dry areas and it keeps the motion in the ocean. I think that's just a difficult way of saying she was high maintenance, I just wanted to put it in her words. What I knew for sure about her though, was that Suyin's tide could drown people, it had done so before.

I had hoped I would get a chance to find some common ground with Opal and Kuvira about what happened last night, talk the whole thing over like adults before it became a problem. But the Matriarch had other plans which meant that the world was duly put on hold to accommodate her. Suyin couldn't move mountains but she was more than used to moving oceans.

Before dismounting me she kindly requested some time alone with her "daughters" as she insisted on calling them. The word made me even more uncomfortable, if such a thing was possible considering I was effectually helping them cover up their borderline incestous love affair. But if Su wanted to feign ignorance about the whole thing it was on her and I wasn't about to get in the middle of it. That was a battle they would have to fight themselves when they were ready.

"I'm sure you understand." She said. I repressed the urge to give her a mock salute, settling for a stern nod that would have done Kuvira proud.

"Yeah of course." I said.

If Opal or Kuvira had heard it they would probably have spoken up on my behalf, but they didn't and my pride wouldn't allow me to crawl to either of them and ask them to defend me.

I did understand anyway, but not for the reasons she thought. I'd learned pretty early that adults hate having company when they indulge themselves, and making Kuvira sit ramrod straight for an entire night, stewing in her own nervous sweat, seemed to be a particular indulgence of Suyin.

I knew her intentions were probably a lot less mischievous than I imagined and it's not like she knew I lived there. Otherwise she would probably have invited me to dine with them and that would have been it.

She straightened her robes and strode onwards through the apartment like she owned it, which she did, but it still kinda grated on me how she seemed to inspect it every time she came by as to assert that no wild college parties were held there.

I am not totally sure if she was sad or delighted to find that they weren't but I was a bit intimidated by her and I didn't feel like asking.

She looked into Kuvira's room, or mine, if you wanna get technical and I saw Kuvira's brow crease with annoyance at Suyin looking upon my mess as if it was hers. She asked me five times or more to keep it neat. Kuvira was impeccably tidy.

Kuvira and I held ourselves at attention, you could probably have ironed shirt on both of our backs. I do that sometimes with authoritative adults without really realizing it. Suyin surveyed me, as to discern why I hadn't left yet. I threw a look at my empty backpack and the items flung about the room. Deciding there was no point in retrieving them, or my clothes.

Opal mouthed 'I'm sorry' at me when I waved goodbye. I flashed my half smile to say it was alright.


	5. A rare moment of truth

**A/N: The story has been mostly rewritten. The most significant change for you as a reader is the change in chapters. All chapters have been cut in length which means that the initial 4 chapters now span 9 chapters instead with chapters 3-4-5 being more or less completely new. I hope you will enjoy the edited story as well as the new and upcoming chapters (11 will be uploaded one of the coming days.)**

 **Chapter 5: A rare moment of truth.**

After an hour of walking around aimlessly I gave up and headed back to the gym.

I started my warm up with some cardio followed by a few sets of full body exercises.

It felt good to be moving around after my nap.

All my spare time was spent napping, or nursing my building gaming addiction. I never played computer games before but Opal had basically every console in existence and it was somewhat growing on me.

I began running through different forms in an effort to still the whirlpool of thoughts inside my head. Suyin, Kuvira, Opal, class, homework, pro bending, how little I was seeing Mako and Bolin, how boring training was without Bolin's commentary, how tired Tenzin had sounded on the phone this morning and finally my new team captain and his infuriating condescending smirk.

Kiss my ass rich boy.

Coming to Teotech had been a shock in itself.

I never had money growing up and my foster parents had four other kids so there was never much to go around.

Here everyone wore clothes from brands I couldn't even pronounce and everyone had a Satomobile of their own and a Cabbage Computer. They spoke casually about things like summer houses, boats and 'house staff'.

The only house staff I ever owned was an airbending glider.

Out of some desperate attempt to prove myself academically I chose engineering, which thankfully held more down to earth students who'd come here for the actual education not the prestige it brought.

On the first day of class I had found myself unexpectedly face to face with the beautiful features of that raven haired woman who had haunted my dreams for almost a year. Asami Sato.

She strode into class with that self satisfied smile plastered on her lips. I had thought about how perfectly her plump lips curled and shaped into that mockery of a smile a thousand times or more. How it's owner only did it because she had learned from a book that smiles were meant to convey happiness and that is what she wanted to convey.

Asami hardly ever smiled with her eyes.

I'd seen it happen a few times that had been enough to make me a bit of an expert, because Asami's genuine smile was really something to behold. Not… whatever that thing she did with her mouth was. She could be one of those people who were destined for alcoholism, only really happy when they were buzzed.

Some petty part of me wondered if Mako had ever gotten to see her real smile. Did he treasure it like I did or was she just another leaf in his wind?

I really hate how sentimental this girl made me.

We didn't sit together and I wouldn't really had known what to say to her anyway if we had.

When we finally did end up sitting together she acted like she'd never met me before which stung like a bitch.

I was polite but didn't try and stir up any conversation, I wasn't particularly proud of my conduct that night at the bar so if she wanted to pretend it never happened that was okay by me.

Can't say I was ever one for treading carefully but something about Asami's cold demeanor made me think about how she had shot me down before I even got into my stride and started being really charming.

Maybe she thought about it too because she didn't feel the need to do so again, or maybe I just made sure she knew it wasn't necessary by being so quiet.

So far our interactions had been limited to hi, can I borrow a pen and one instance of me asking her to see her notes. She let me see her screen for a good thirty seconds but didn't offer any explanation. I jotted down the gist of it and that was about it for the first few months.

It annoyed me to no end that this girl who clearly didn't want anything to do with me could take up so many of my precious daydreaming timeslots.

I walked through the gym towards the locker rooms, not really sure why I veered off until I realized I was following something.

That sound.

Like something hard hitting the sandbags over and over again.

I'd become a bit of a rule ghoul in here and the chance to admonish some meat cake for bending rocks at the bags was just too much to resist.

I didn't see a meat cake though.

I saw Asami Sato, kicking a bag over and over again in the same perfect kick. Left leg drawn back a little and bent at an angle, hands up in a tight guard to protect her face.

Her right leg pulled forward extended just enough to cause a heavy thud then retreating behind her into a perfect stance. The height of the kick was enough to hit me in the chest yet she made it look almost effortless.

A slight sheen of sweat covered her skin and her breath was heavy but not out of control. If her leg hurt she didn't show it in any way I could discern but the front of her shin looked very red from the repeated impact.

I stood there, enthralled by her perfect form until she stopped.

Shrieking as she noticed me behind her.

"Damn Korra. That's creepy."

I froze, I hadn't considered that it would be but now she mentioned it I did feel a little guilty about sneaking up on her like that.

"Right, sorry I didn't want to disturb. I was just admiring your form."

Amongst other things.

Asami glared at me, "I'm sure you were."

Her tone was accusing and it grated me in all the wrong ways.

She was right of course but I didn't much like hearing it from her. This girl might be hot but her attitude wasn't.

I grimaced and moved to another sandbag where she could see me plainly.

"I'll use this one over here, so you don't have to worry about me watching you." I growled.

She bit her lip and had the decency to look a little guilty.

In truth I was too tired to box, I just didn't want to leave. This was the first time I had seen Asami outside of class and probably the most we had spoken to each other in a year.

My form might not be as perfect as Asami's but it was born out of years in the pro bending ring, so I made up for it with speed and power.

I found my groove and reigned hell on the poor thing.

The heavily duct taped sandbag swayed and jerked on its chain with my punches.

The more aggravated I got the harder I hit it.

I bit back the growing fatigue and hammered the poor thing with quick relentless strikes.

Until a familiar but highly unwelcome feeling washed over me.

I didn't normally go into the Avatar state because I found it incredibly hard to control but it hit me like a ton of bricks.

Compelled by my emotional turmoil and exhaustion.

I felt my bones ache as my punch went straight through the bag and caught on something hard in the middle. The sandbag went flying and smacked into the brick wall with a thunderous roar.

I yelped with surprise and fell to my knees, clutching my right hand.

I began counting and around the 20 second mark I could feel the avatar state retreat, as always leaving me a little emptier than before.

Asami was watching me with wide eyes her mouth was slightly agape and she looked to be in full flight or fight mode.

I fought back the impulse to retch and looked away. "I won't hurt you Asami."

"You're the Avatar." She stated, more to herself than me. "The most powerful bender in the world."

I gave her a defeated sort of laugh, "My punches aren't half bad either."

"Your eyes went white. Like…"

"Like I was possessed by the spirit of light and peace?"

She looked at me like I just told a wildly inappropriate joke. "Is that what you are?"

I shrugged. I had delved pretty deep into my Avatar memories but it was all convoluted, hard to make sense of. That's the problem with taking advice from ancient spirits, they really don't know how to communicate on your level. Few people knew what the Avatar actually was.

"I think so."

Her reptilian brain unkicked and she relaxed slightly.

"Why did that happen? Why did it possess you?"

"Raava is always inside me, she only comes out when I… eh. Emotional distress." I finished awkwardly and averted her gaze.

A look of unfiltered interest crossed Asami's face.

She stalked towards me and the view of rolling hips and tight lycra brought my eyes back to her.

I know I'm a shallow piece of shit but my throat went painfully dry as I watched her close the distance between us.

I know how much I was ignoring all the warning signs, the little things she said or did that told me that this girl was wrong for me on so many levels.

To be perfectly honest I was more than prepared to forget about all that just to have her body pressed close to mine.

This girl who was scared out of her mind not two seconds ago upon seeing my true identity looked about ready to eat me. I didn't know how to feel about that at the time, I was too entranced by the sight of long slender legs and a flat toned stomach. I didn't want to look up, and at that moment I was pretty sure Asami didn't want me to either.

She kissed me and it was an odd thing.

Nearly without passion but still somehow invoking all the feeling kissing a raven haired goddess oughta.

We did not embrace and she never did close her eyes fully, but her lips were on mine and for one blissful second I drank deep from her perfect red lips.

Then she pulled back and I was hit with all the regret that comes from not drawing in and trapping something wonderful when you have the chance.

My eyes met hers, she looked really fucking smug and honestly it pissed me off.

"What happened to not being gay?" I snarled.

She struck a pose which was carefully choreographed to make it look like she was thinking about my question before letting out this gem; "Is the Avatar even a girl? Or are you something more?"

"I'm a fucking person Asami. Not the Avatar. Sake. I thought the heiress to a fucking empire would understand what it is like having other people shove you into boxes."

That seemed to break through to her and her confidence faltered.

She looked contrite but I wondered how genuine it was, her little display made me aware of just how little I actually knew her and it sort of scared me that I had even let her get under my skin.

I wasn't normally a very guarded person but something about Asami told me that it was wise to be so around her.

"You are right of course. That was tactless of me. I admit I don't remember that much from the evening at that horrible bar…"

What a fucking liar. I knew she recognized me instantly and she probably remembered every word we said, she had remembered my name at least which belied her statement.

"... but we did agree to be more civil to each other. I am sorry I said that."

I stepped forward and captured her lips again. Not because there was any real sexual tension going on.

I merely wanted to even the score between us and somehow leave an impression of a kiss that wasn't so infuriatingly passive. For a brief spell I held her against me and poured all my strange conflicting needs into her. She whimpered and it pleased me to no end, spurring my lips to coax just a bit more passion from hers.

I seperated us roughly. "Now we can be civil to each other."

She seemed a bit winded but quickly regained her composure, she looked at me rather coldly before gathering her gym bag. She strolled away from me towards the exit all while acting like nothing had happened.

This girl. Honestly.


	6. The unavoidable truth

**A/N: The story has been mostly rewritten. The most significant change for you as a reader is the change in chapters. All chapters have been cut in length which means that the initial 4 chapters now span 9 chapters instead with chapters 3-4-5 being more or less completely new. I hope you will enjoy the edited story as well as the new and upcoming chapters (11 will be uploaded one of the coming days.)**

 **Chapter 6: The unavoidable truth**

There is a certain implication to the old saying; the road to hell is paved with good intentions. Symbolic logic tells us that the contraposition must also be true, meaning that for all intents and purpose the road to heaven must be paved by bad intentions.

Unless of course you chose to spend your entire life caged up without ever making a decision for yourself, losing by default because you didn't manage to use your intentions for anything at all.

Intentions are our brains telling us to act in one way or another because it's the _Right_ _way_ as opposed to the very much _Wrong_ one.

Right now I was pretty sure that the kind of introverted bullshit I had indulged in for the past few days was definitely the _wrong_ thing. More so that I should never even attempt to sound clever but because It really wasn't very convincing.

I decided not to go home after leaving the gym.

Opal and Kuvira's fucking always became nigh intolerable after they'd played it cool for Suyin all night and in my current mood I wasn't up for spending a night jealousy masturbating while listening to them. Neither did I think they would be up for a repeat performance of last night or worse a long winded conversation about it, so I lugged my sweaty unshowered body towards the bus stop and waited 25 minutes for the cross town express. Express being used in the loosest sense of the word.

When the buildings started getting plainer and the streets didn't seem quite so clean anymore I began feeling at home.

I really needed to be somewhere that felt like home right now.

In spite of my foster parents poverty I always had all my emotional needs covered there, either by Tenzin and Pema or by their kids. They were more like parents to me than anyone down south ever was, and Jinora was more than a sister, perhaps something closer to a twin.

With her petite frame it was easy to forget that she was only a year younger than me.

Twilight was slowly giving way to the darkness of night. The only occupant in the bus was the early chill, it swirled and played in the air. Outside the daytime crowd gave way to the people of the night. Republic City was no stranger to homelessness, dealers or pimps and everything that entails. The further I traveled the more frequent they became, flanked by bright neon and faint pulsing bass lines.

At the end of the road were the rural areas, wide boulevards flanked by tall government housing. Apart from the towering concrete squares everything was smaller here, dustier. A brisk northern wind trailed a trickle of a thousand little particles from the vast expanse of desert beyond the city lines.

Thankfully I did not need to travel quite that far. When I got off the dust was limited to smaller piles in corners and on the roadside, in cracks and clumps around the windowsills. Further out there would be more but here it was just enough to make it feel like home. I remember how we used to get half naked before entering the apartment, shaking clouds of dust from our clothes to save ourselves half an hours sweeping.

I felt physically and emotionally exhausted. Even so that wasn't going to deter me from enjoying the chaotic simplicity of a night spent with Republic City's largest airbending congregation.

If there was one place that gave me hope for the reversal of entropy it was there. Perhaps that is a really odd thing to say but in my mind I was convinced that whatever net energy Ikky and Meelo put into the world it was definitely more than they had been granted. Their meager calorie intake could definitely not account for it so there must be some undiscovered biological success story in their genes.

In my current lethargy I was pretty sure it was exactly what I needed.

I reflected for a moment about how harshly I judged Kuvira for taking the Beifong's wealth for granted. I always kinda did the same thing with the Caelum's, just in other ways.

Self reflection really is a bitch sometimes.

Especially when it makes you realize things that you'd rather ignore, like how much shit I was in with Asami. I didn't really understand why I wanted so desperately to be around her when she was obviously a total bitch.

Because the universal hate towards me had yet to go full circle we didn't share all our classes.

She was taking the theoretical line for non benders and I the practical one for benders, but we did end up sharing quite a bit of classes on some of the basic theory.

College would have been much more suited to my taste if it had been all practical and much less theory. I don't think I am dumb but I struggled a bit with the math.

Judging by the looks Asami threw me in class, she definitely did think I was dumb, just another bird brained jock probably getting carried through my classes by tutors. I wish.

It was nearly 10 before I rounded the corner to the Caelum household. I knew they wouldn't mind, Tenzin always kept late hours and by extension so did everyone else, apart from baby Rohan who had a schedule entirely to himself.

A humidifying truck passed me and I got a faint sprinkle of saltwater on my already rather sodden clothes.

Early on the city had realized it was easier to wet the dust until it clumped together rather than sweep it and create clouds that travelled even further downtown.

Ikky opened the door when I knocked and immediately my surroundings were drowned in the drawn out squeal only manageable by 11 year old girls and a I think a certain race of dolphin.

"Korra is here!" She yelled. I attempted to hug her but she wrinkled her nose at me, "Korra you stink."

"Yes I think the entire building is aware of that dear." Pema said, she had that sweet smile on her lips and the bags under her eyes were a little greyer than last time I saw her, but she still looked genuinely happy to see me and right now that was the best feeling in the world.

I smiled widely and drew her into a bear hug "I'm sorry I am so smelly." I said but I didn't release her and she probably didn't want me too either because her laughter threaded through the air like a delicate strand of pearls.

Yup, this was home.

Tenzin gave me a firm handshake when I sat down across from him in the small kitchen. I could talk about how worn the vinyl on the floor was, or how the veneer on every piece of cheap furniture they had was starting to peel. There were stains on things that had grown permanent and the whole place was a cluttered mess but really what struck me most was how much Tenzin had changed since I was here a month ago.

Pema looked a little worse for wear, which wasn't surprising, when I lived here I did much of the babysitting but now it was up to them and Jinora to keep the kids in line, and like me, Jinora was still a kid herself. Well, not as much, Jinora was one of those strange kids who somehow skipped their teenage years and went straight into adulthood but if anything that only made her more combative.

Seeing Tenzin like this was something of a shock. He looked thinner, greyer and impossibly balder than ever before. Which is saying something as I have never actually seen Tenzin with head hair.

Except on photos from their youth.

Pema told me that he used to smile a lot back then, I'm not sure I believed her then and judging by the state of him now those days were long past anyway.

"How is school?" He asked.

"Difficult... I dunno if I made the right choice with engineering. It is harder than I thought." I answered honestly. I could see something was going on but that was no excuse to lie, even if I whined a little they always trusted me to handle my own problems.

He looked thoughtful for a moment, "You can still change your mind. If you really don't like it."

That is what I really liked about Tenzin in spite of his seriousness he was always a bit of an optimist.

"You hungry dear?" Pema asked.

I was dead hungry, but I didn't want to take the food out of their mouths so I shook my head. "I'm fine, but I'll help you if you want."

"That would be nice, here you go." She flopped down a bag of sliced bread and a jar of strawberry jam in front of me and I began making kiddie sized sandwiches.

Tenzin's eyes kept skimming at the words on his paper but I could tell he was reading the same part over and over. He only ever did that when something was really bad.

I got up and closed the kitchen door before resuming my sandwich factory line.

"So, what's going on?" I asked without lifting my eyes from the bread I was smearing with red.

By the passing of time I could sense them sharing something without words.

Tenzin cleared his throat, but it was Pema who spoke up.

"It's cancer."

I dropped the knife and suffered a nice red stain on my otherwise white gym shorts. Tenzin didn't meet my eyes but Pema looked at me with hers full of sorrow.

"What did the healers say?" I asked.

Tenzin's voice was raspy "Incurable."

"And the doctors?"

He shook his head.

"When did you find out?" I asked him.

He looked up at me and the sight of his face, the face belonging to the man I loved as a father was enough to break my heart. His tears were falling, large and heavy enough to make a sound when they hit the paper underneath. "It's not me." He said.

I clamped my palm over my mouth and my gaze snapped to Pema's.

She reached out to take my shoulder but I jerked away violently.

"Korra." She said, her voice was pleading.

Something twisted violently inside me. I felt the uncomfortable push of the avatar state tingle beneath my skin. As if it was going to help me handle this.

Without warning it became too much and I tore from the kitchen, halfway ripping the door from its hinges. I reached the front door without letting the kids see me and let myself out.


	7. When we don't even know we're lying

**A/N: The story has been mostly rewritten. The most significant change for you as a reader is the change in chapters. All chapters have been cut in length which means that the initial 4 chapters now span 9 chapters instead with chapters 3-4-5 being more or less completely new. I hope you will enjoy the edited story as well as the new and upcoming chapters (11 will be uploaded one of the coming days.)**

 **Chapter 7: When we don't even know we're lying.**

As soon as I felt the chill of night around me I began to cry in earnest.

I knew I was selfish to leave like that but right now I couldn't handle my grief, not around them, not around the kids.

I let the avatar state take over and fill me, right now the nothingness couldn't deter me because I longed for it.

I'd still feel like crap afterwards but it couldn't possibly be worse than this, I felt hollow like a shell and ready to crack.

I looked up into the sky and without thinking I let loose a jet of fire from my hands and feet and I flew.

I didn't know that it was possible, sure I had seen Avatars do it in their memories, but for me? No.

The only thing on my mind was how much I hoped Suyin had left already or I might be in real danger of outing Kuvira and Opal.

I wasn't sure Opal would mind much but Kuvira could be kind of prissy about these things.

I touched down somewhere outside campus utterly exhausted. I had to drag myself the last bit until I was finally swallowed by the warmth of our apartment building. I hadn't realized just how cold I was but now I felt the sting of heat return to my skin and I shivered violently.

I couldn't summon the willpower to heat the air around me so I ignored it.

Tears still fell freely from my eyes and I didn't know if they would ever stop.

I entered the elevator and just as it was about to close Asami jumped in.

By the time she took in the state of me the doors had halfway closed and it was too late to change her mind.

I must have looked a right mess because she stared at me like I was a mad woman.

"Eh."

I wiped my nose on my arm and her eyes followed it, she was too shocked to look disgusted and I didn't care if she was.

"Fancy meeting you here." I said in my broken voice. Korra you fucking idiot.

"Yeah…" She seemed incredibly embarrassed to be in my company and I didn't blame her. If I didn't know any better I would think she looked guilty.

"So. Did you want something?"

"What?"

"I mean you are here…"

Something clicked in my head.

"I'm going home. I'm not here to see you."

She looked so relieved.

"Oh. Okay."

"What do you mean 'Oh okay'?" I snapped. "Is that all you have to say? A second ago you thought that this…" I gestured to the state of my, well, everything. "Was your fault and now all you have is 'Oh okay'? You're a real fucking piece of work you know."

She looked properly ticked off by my tone. "I'm a piece of work? What the hell did you want me to think? You're standing there in your goddamn short shorts covered in snot and crying your eyes out when not an hour ago we…" She looked mortified about what she had been about to say.

The elevator stopped on my floor but I didn't get out. "We were what Asami? Kissing? Because that is what I remember. Us kissing and you turning around and leaving with that fucking scowl on your face like I was your favorite dog and I just pissed all over your bed!"

She repeated the scowl and it made me well up with a short hysterical laughter. "Oh so that is what this is all about. You found out I was the Avatar and you thought what? I would just give you a taste and you could pretend it meant nothing? Who does that?"

Her breath hitched in her throat and I could tell she was fighting back her own tears. I wanted desperately to understand why but I was just so goddamn angry. At her, at Pema and Tenzin and at myself.

The second I thought about Pema I began crying again, I banged my head into the side of the elevator, my face left a smear of tears and mucus that I didn't have the strength to wipe off. I didn't care if she saw me crying and right now the cool mirror was the best comfort I could hope for.

I didn't have the mental capacity to control what was happening with me, so when Asami lead me out of the elevator I followed. Her grip was firm around my arm, I could tell she was holding it in the area she deemed the cleanest but I didn't have anything clever to say about it so I just let my feet carry me in whatever direction she was going.

There was barely a hallway and only two doors. One was a fire escape the other one looked heavy duty, like it was custom designed to keep out unwanted company.

I can't say anything in this building was cheap but nobody here had doors like that.

For one terrifying moment I thought she was a psycho and I would have to fight my way out of some metaphorical sex dungeon.

I didn't think anything behind it could be good.

I didn't realize until much later that I was probably the first person to enter through those doors who didn't absolutely need to be here.

Asami was economical with the time she afforded other people.

Sure she could be wasteful with money, with resources to obtain her goals and more specifically with other people's emotions.

She had little care for how things were treated only that it did not drain on the one resource that was preciously finite to her, time.

The world was big and there was always something else out there.

Maybe that is why she kissed me.

I was something wholly unique and somehow she didn't really know how to react to that, other than wanting to own it. Or at least put her mark on it.

Asami was not used to her toys biting back. They would be long gone; discarded, before anything like that ever became relevant.

I talked back to her.

I was sassy and I got angry much too quickly. We had those things in common.

She placed me on her couch in a rather unceremonious fashion. I curled into it and hoped to dear god she would leave me alone because I could not deal with another round of bullshit from either of us.

I flinched when I felt something cool on my face and I realized she was using a clean kitchen rag to wipe my face free of tears. The gesture was nice but the choice of rag was not. I was sure this girl owned washcloths, heck they were probably monogrammed and folded in tight little rolls. I couldn't believe she would use a kitchen rag instead, like I was some piece of filth to be wiped off her counter.

The part of me that always seem to slip slightly into lunacy whenever I am seriously distressed wanted to rip it from her hands and squeeze the tears back onto my face. She didn't deserve them and neither did that fucking rag.

For the second time tonight there was a moment where things kinda clicked together in my brain and all those painful hours reliving our brief night together kinda made sense.

Why I was hating her so much kinda made sense.

Asami had changed.

Sure she had been a bitch back then, she'd thrown her money around and acted like a sheltered brat.

In spite of that fact the sheltered brat had managed to invoke my sympathy. She'd taken my hand, we'd been friendly to each other several times. She even remembered me from a game.

I watched her face carefully now, and to be fair I don't think she was looking even half as smug as I judged her to be.

Sure my judgement of her had some merits but this girl also looked legitimately worried about what was happening, and maybe even about me.

She looked older than she had back then.

Well no shit, being 18 or 19 or whatever she was that sorta time does tend to be noticeable.

I groaned a little because right now I didn't think I could handle Asami. I was not mentally equipped for dealing with whatever shit was going on with her and she didn't look any more able to deal with mine. So we held some odd status quo, in which she dabbed my forehead and I looked at her with my brow furrowed and my eyes narrow and observant.

"Well, you seem to have calmed down now." Her face was passive, unreadable.

"Yeah. Thanks." I took the rag from her and reluctantly used it to clean the rest of my face. "I'm… eh."

This was the part where I should be apologizing or thanking her for helping me but I choked. Like I do whenever I have to talk about something related to my emotions. Opal and Kuvira really dodged a bullet with me.

"I think we should talk." I finally said. It was lame and totally vague and I could tell that she was annoyed.

We were sitting in the living room of a rather large penthouse. The whole place seemed to be in a single elongated room with a kitchen in one end and a large bed in the other. One side was one long window, occasionally broken by a divider or a door that lead outside to a narrow wooden deck.

Beyond the 'bedroom' was a larger area walled off but still open enough for me to decide it must be some sort of office. It seemed too large for that but this was hardly the time to talk about architecture.

Asami crossed to a fridge, like most of her appliances it was all brushed steel flanked by glossy black. She fished out two glass bottles of juice and handed one to me before sitting on an odd sort of designer chair next to the sofa, it didn't look very comfortable and judging by her expression she didn't think so either. I couldn't help but think that this was probably the first time she had ever sat in it.

Asami noticed my wandering gaze.

"Would you like a tour? Or would you like to talk?" Her voice was reluctant. Like she wasn't thrilled about doing either of those things.

I gave her a searching look, I wasn't sure what I would find but I hoped for something. Some sliver of emotion that betrayed that she cared about me.

"I'm fine here. Talking."

She leaned back on the chair.

"Let's talk then."

The next thirty seconds contained the most oppressive silence of my life.

"I'm sorry." The knot in my throat loosened slightly when I began to speak, and it was odd really that I found it relieving. "For how I acted in the elevator. I was upset about something else and I took it out on you."

As soon as I thought about why I was upset the tears began flowing again but I wiped at them angrily and willed myself to look at Asami instead of the floor.

She looked worried. Almost apologetic.

"You have a right to be angry though." Her sigh was shaky and nervous. "I haven't been treating you very well. It was wrong of me to kiss you like that."

"It's not just that Asami. Since that night… You thought I was hitting on you then too. I thought we really did hit it off, as friends at least, but then you just act like I don't even exist."

"Are you referring to how you flirted with me all night and all but stripped naked for me?" She hissed. "That was really unfair."

I nodded slowly.

The silence stretched for a bit while I absorbed her words.

"I didn't realize how much I was upsetting you. You just… You were so quick to reject me that I guess I just wanted to show you that you were wrong. You did want me, and judging by that kiss I think I was at least partially right."

"Really? Because you were pretty quick to accuse me of just kissing you because you're the Avatar."

Damn my ego to hell.

I rubbed my neck, the motion reminded me of how badly I smelled, it was a wonder Asami had even stayed with me in that elevator, even more so that she was sitting here with me.

"I don't know. I guess I am just kinda tired of making assumptions about you."

"Then stop."

I gave her a pleading sort of look. It felt pathetic but I had already made myself so vulnerable in front of her that I just didn't really care anymore.

Her face went taut and now it was her turn to search mine for something and I think she was pretty surprised to find it there. Raw emotion, telling her, begging her, pleading with her to react and let down her guard.

She looked away and it damn near broke my heart.


	8. Truth is a fickle mistress

**A/N: The story has been mostly rewritten. The most significant change for you as a reader is the change in chapters. All chapters have been cut in length which means that the initial 4 chapters now span 9 chapters instead with chapters 3-4-5 being more or less completely new. I hope you will enjoy the edited story as well as the new and upcoming chapters (11 will be uploaded one of the coming days.)**

 **Chapter 8: Truth is a fickle mistress.**

One of the really annoying things about Asami was how much power she held over my emotions.

There wasn't even love there. Just a kind of faint hope. A inkling that there existed a feeble connection between us that could be something wonderful or at the very least a passionate night we could both look back on and remember fondly.

Right now I didn't much care which it was gonna be, I just really wanted one or the other and if I had to be honest with myself it probably wasn't the sex.

They say that a candle that burns twice as bright burns half as long but I think our relationship so far has been more like a gasoline can spilled by a careless hand onto the ground, waiting for a spark to ignite it into something beautiful and terrible, and incredibly short lived.

A blazing fireball lighting up the monotony of whatever funk she and I was in.

The truth of the matter was that I was damaged goods, and by the looks of it so was Asami.

I figured her heart might just need a hard reboot and I wasn't beneath trying.

Asami sat on her designer chair nipping at a bottle of juice. I'd drunk my own in two long swigs and it had been the best thing I ever had in my life, sweeter still than Asami's lips had been on mine, but perhaps not nearly as thirst quenching. Or maybe it was the other way around.

I didn't feel like being very poetic but I guess it's kinda hard to turn your brain off. Unless you're kissing Asami Sato, or trying to determine an l-beams moment of inertia about the vertical axis.

Shit. Apparently Asami made me better at engineering by proxy, that was quite a feat because I hadn't lied about how bad I was at it. Even if I did tend to be rather dishonest about things in general.

I placed my glass bottle on the table and scooted a bit closer to her.

"I know I'm really bad at apologies. You tried to say sorry and I kept pushing for you to admit to something that probably wasn't even true. I just really wanted you to say that the kiss meant something, because… Fuck. It meant something to me you know?"

I recalled how certain she sounded about Mako getting better at playing that bass. He never did but in the moment she said there was no doubt in her voice. I wanted to know what happened to that person even if it meant braving into the unknown and opening up a little about myself.

She still didn't look at me and it was about all it took for me to feel the slight increase in body heat that normally accompanies my temper. Hot headed had always been a rather apt description of my personality.

"Korra… It did mean something." Her voice was very frail but it didn't stop my spirits from soaring. She had earned a smile and I gave it to her unfiltered, it would have been hard to stop it from cracking my face in two anyway. It was so easy for her to make me happy.

"Are you still friends with Mako?" she asked after a bit. Fuck.

Finally a chance to talk about Mako, our favorite subject.

This was quickly becoming a repeat performance of our first meeting and I wondered again what the hell her problem was. You can't be talking about kissing someone and your ex in the same breath, it was hella rude.

I gave her a shrug that hopefully conveyed my utter disinterest in the subject, she didn't continue and the insistent way she was looking at me made me realize she didn't think that my shrug had been anything in the way of an answer.

"I guess, Bolin has been my best friend since we were kids. We just don't hang out as much anymore so I hardly ever see him or his brother. Either way me and Mako were never that close." Okay maybe that was sort of a lie, Mako might not be as close a friend to me as Bolin, Jinora or Kuvira and Opal but he was probably fifth in that row. At least I had been telling the truth about not seeing him that often anymore, fifty percent honesty was still well within the green zone for me.

Asami drew up her legs so she could rest her chin on a knee.

"He never told you about our break up did he?"

I wondered why the hell we were still talking about Mako when we were just talking about something far more interesting, but I guess Asami wasn't much like me, I always liked getting straight to the point while she seemed happy to dive and dodge around it. Like her fancy penthouse apartment it was just a diversion to keep up appearances about politeness and I realized how much it annoyed me that she had felt the need to drag Mako's ghosts into this.

I wondered if they ever did it, because I'm apparently human filth who can't help but constantly cater to her lowest instincts. Asami didn't seem like the kinda girl who would put out after four weeks, but of course she didn't seem like a smoker either and I had been wrong on that account. At least somewhat.

"No. I don't think he told Bolin about it either. It was all very strange. Rather like this conversation."

Too blunt. Idiot. Abort.

She scowled at me.

"... BUT! It's nice to finally talk again, about something else than how dysfunctional we are together. I mean, You can talk to me about it if you want."

What a horrible recovery that was. Asami narrowed her eyes.

She didn't resume the conversation and the only thing I could think of saying was 'Sorry I'm an ass'. I just didn't feel much like following one apology with the next.

"Anyway... My battery is dead." I flashed her my phone to show what I meant. "Can I borrow your phone?"

She tossed me her cell and I went to stand by the window to create a little distance between us.

I remembered the number fine, I didn't have a phone when I came here and I had been forced to remember all my numbers in case anything ever happened, and things always seemed to happen around me.

This particular number hadn't changed in the five years I've had it. I dialed it and someone answered before the third ring.

"Hello?"

"Hey…" I fiddled a little with the latch on the sliding door leading out to Asami's deck. I wondered if she would prefer it if i called from out there but part of me wanted her to hear this, in the dead silence of her flat I am sure the acoustics threw Pema's voice far enough for Asami to pick it out, even if she didn't catch every word.

"Korra. I'm so glad you called. I was so worried about you. You left without your jacket. Where are you calling from… Are you safe?"

"Yeah I'm safe, I'm with... " I glanced at Asami, "I'm with someone. Listen. I'm so sorry about running out like that. I just..."

"Oh sweetheart, that's okay. Of all our kids we knew you'd be the one who could handle this the best, that doesn't mean I thought it would be easy for you. You take the time you need okay?" After a moment she added, "the others don't know yet."

My heart clenched painfully when she said _our kids_.

"Even Jinora?"

"We are telling her as soon as we have a better prognosis." Pema said. She didn't offer any explanation about what she meant and frankly I didn't want to know more than I did right now. The less I knew the more it would seem like this had just been a bad dream, I could forget about it until Pema invited me for dinner, there I would look appropriately shocked when they sat us down in the living room.

All us kids pressed into a small sofa and Tenzin with Pema on his arm rest, that was how they delivered news, good or bad. Always in that same way.

Tenzin would always begin and somewhere along his rather long winded explanations Pema took over. Her voice sure, firm in the face of adversity because even with good news it often meant some calamity or other. Maybe it was like that when you were poor, and living in a crummy three bedroom apartment at the outskirts of the dust district.

All news, even the good, carried a seed of something bad in it. New work meant new responsibilities for everyone, more money meant we got a nicer pair of shoes and we had to take them off before exiting the bus so they wouldn't gather dust in the seams. In school you could always recognize the kids from dust town because their shoes were impeccably clean and their socks and ankles brown and caked with dust.

"Okay." I answered, Pema sighed with relief, I'm not sure if it was because I didn't ask anymore questions that she didn't want to answer, or if she was just happy I hadn't lost my temper again.

"I'd like for you to be there when we tell them. You are as much part of this family as anyone."

I held back my sobs, but I know she could hear my voice crack.

"Just let me know when. I'll be there. Whatever you guys need."

She was silent for a long time then. I think she must've held her hand over the receiver because I couldn't hear her at all.

"We know sweetheart. Get some sleep, okay?" Her tone was aiming towards neutrality but i could hear the remnants of her tears there.

I nodded until I realized I would have to speak again. "I will, goodnight mom."

"Goodnight Korra."

I tipped the latch on the door and walked out into the icy Republic City night.

The deck was hardwood and looked well cared for if a little barren. I leaned on the railing there, taking in the splendid view of our campus and the park beyond it.

Asami joined me, lighting a cigarette.

Her eyes darted to her phone with some unease at seeing it dangle over the edge in a rather careless grip.

"Better not drop that, its a platinum casing but even that won't survive twenty stories."

I reached over and pushed it into her jeans pocket.

"So what now?" She asked.

"I dunno. We can fight some more if you want. Unless you wanna tell me why you suddenly started talking about Mako when I mentioned our kiss. You're not over him or something?"

Her face which had been so tender and understanding, hardened.

"I was over him before we even begun. He was a nice guy, the kind I thought I could bring home and he would set everything straight. So to speak."

That sounded like a lie, but who was I to judge? If Asami wasn't ready to be honest about Mako it wasn't really my place to call her out on it.

"I have no idea what you're talking about. You told me your dad liked him."

"Yeah. He did. Until Mako started blabbing about his pro bending."

"That's a bad thing?"

She took a long drag from her cigarette. I noticed it was another brand than last time, short and thick, the kind meant for actual smokers not the kind of pretend smoker she had been back then.

"No. Not to me. But my dad…" She flashed me a strained sorta smile, "he's big on politics. Equalist politics."

"Ah. That sucks"

"It does."

"So daddy had a freakout when he found out Mako's a firebender?"

"To put it mildly, he threatened to disown me."

Ah there it was. Korra couldn't imagine Asami picking her money over anyone.

"So you left him." I stated.

She looked furious at that. "I must certainly did not. Mako broke up with me."

"Oh."

"Yeah 'Oh'."

"Why though?"

"Because he had just an inch of sense Korra. Who would throw away their family and their company for a boy she's dated for 4 weeks? I put my heart into that company I couldn't just turn my back on it for a pretty face." She said that, and it sounded to me like she was repeating what someone else, probably Mako, told her. Maybe I was just being judgemental though, but it didn't sound like I was the one she wanted to convince.

"So your dad gets to decide who you can and cannot date? In return for what?"

"A controlling interest in the company."

"So you just have to live in the bender loving closet until he decides you're ready? Sounds fucking awful."

"It's not so bad."

"Then why did you kiss me?"

Asami's mouth snapped closed with an obvious click.

"I don't think that question is very fair."

"Well, it's not very fair just kissing someone like that."

Her sigh was heavy, so much so it slackened her posture slightly and made her hang over the railing a little too casually for comfort.

"I don't know why I did it."

I grinned, and flexed a bicep "I think I do."

"Please take your arm down I can smell you from here."

"Hey. That smell is what keeps this body ripped. I saw you in the gym, little miss yoga pants and sports bra." I poked at her own very toned stomach, "you know this doesn't come easy."

She smiled weakly, "it does when you never remember to eat."

Aha.

"How about we order in then?" I asked, doing my best to be smooth, and pretend like she hadn't just dragged me in here because I was a blubbering mess and she literally had no other choice that to deal with it or leave me there. In a way it was pretty thrilling to have found one of her breaking points. All I had to do was learn to cry on command.

"You really know how to push your luck huh."

"It's what I do. I'll even bend all the four elements if you'll kiss me again."

She chuckled, it was brief and without any actual humor. Right now even that counted as a victory though.

"Okay."

"To food or kissing?"

Her stare was pointed and edged with all sorts of warnings. "Do you want to get kicked out?"

I rubbed my neck nervously, trying to look a little more apologetic than I felt.

"We can order in. but I'm not losing my company on account of a pair of gletscher blue eyes, even if they are very pretty."

"Wow, was that a compliment?"

"Savour it. There won't be another."

I laughed. "Let's see."

"Unless you want me to compliment your smell, it really is extraordinarily pungent."

I cringed a little inwardly, if Opal, or Bolin or even Jinora had made that joke I wouldn't have hesitated before wrestling them to the ground and making them smell my stinky pits but as it was I actually kinda wanted to make a good impression. Or rather, I wanted to make up for all the bad ones.

"Mind If I borrow your shower then?"


	9. The longest standing lie we've kept

**A/N: The story has been mostly rewritten. The most significant change for you as a reader is the change in chapters. All chapters have been cut in length which means that the initial 4 chapters now span 9 chapters instead with chapters 3-4-5 being more or less completely new. I hope you will enjoy the edited story as well as the new and upcoming chapters (11 will be uploaded one of the coming days.)**

 **Chapter 9: The longest standing lie we've kept.**

Five floors down Suyin Beifong was dragging her visit out with a phone call of extraordinary length. Kuvira's rather handsome jaw was clenched tight and her eyes darted towards the small desk that held her homework with increasing frequency. The prospect of her getting anymore work done was dwindling every moment Suyin avoided the crux of her exchange with what Kuvira imagined was a very shrewd business partner. Suyin was apparently waiting for him to decide on the cost of something, the services of her metalbending corps for a full month she gathered, all while skirting the issue of payment herself. It was one of her prefered tactics and Kuvira knew that the moment the businessman offered an amount she would act gravely insulted until he agreed to the price she had decided on in advance.

It was a little dance Suyin did. After all dancing was like a second nature to her, one of the many particularities that shaped her personality and would have made her surprisingly suited for say, the role of an airbender.

It was a wonder really how marvellously direct her daughter had become.

Said girl was currently beguiling Kuvira's attention under the guise of tidying the living room. A thigh there, the tempting length of her flat stomach, the small divots on her back just above the swell of her backside.

All while Opal's pale green eyes bored into those of her lover, saying with no great subtlety 'you're in so much trouble once she leaves'. Kuvira hummed a little with appreciation, ignoring the dangers of doing so in their present company.

Drawing Kuvira's attention from the small pile of cases she had left to study was no small accomplishment, and Opal's wide grin only confirmed her pleasure in the distraction.

In truth nobody ever managed to read through all of their cases between lectures but Kuvira made an honest attempt at it every night. Even on saturdays and sundays. Keeping her from working was Opal's favorite kind of procrastination.

Suyin finally entered her 'enthusiastic nodding phase' which signalled that she was satisfied with their agreement and the slow suffering of listening to her flirt her way through the conversation was coming to a long anticipated end.

Kuvira went to the kitchen to make a pot of 'be gone already' coffee. She felt Opal's hands snake around her waist and sighed with frustration at the prolonged visit. The arms encircling her felt warm and comforting but at the same time they made her uncomfortably aware of her own body. Kuvira would have elected to stay in her mind where the delectable excitement from watching Opal hadn't made her skin so damn responsive to the younger woman.

Teeth grazed Kuvira's ear. Gently pulling at the earlobe, Opal's breath was hot when she spoke "We could tell her you know."

Kuvira's lips tightened into a line. "I don't think this is the appropriate time for that discussion. You know how I feel."

Opal's hands trailed upwards, grasping her breast, gently kneading them as she pulled the metalbender backwards and pressed her back hard against her own lean frame.

"Since when do you worry about appropriate?" Her lips scattered kisses on Kuvira's neck, sucking on her pulsepoint and biting down gently.

This was not the time for marks, that time came later.

For Kuvira's sake she would not leave marks now where none had been before.

The metalbender hissed through clenched teeth at the rough treatment she received from Opal's eager hands and harsh kisses. Enjoying it all the same but knowing it was dangerous territory with Suyin about to end her call and only the angle of the open kitchen hiding them from her view.

"If you keep that up we might end up showing her instead."

"Good." Opal breathed into her ear. She grabbed the metalbender harder, enjoying how Kuvira turned to putty in her hands.

Kuvira held back a whimper and turned around, crashing their mouths together in a short, frantic kiss. Opal parted her lips without delay tasting the bitterness of coffee and the awful tang of the home cooked meal Suyin had insisted on preparing for them.

In spite of Kuvira being an excellent cook, Suyin was apparently afraid they weren't being fed properly, if that had been the case it would have remained true even now. For all her ability in business and on the dancefloor Suyin Beifong had skillfully eluded learning the more basic survival traits on her many journeys as a youth. Such as cooking meat to a respectable sear, while still retaining texture and flavor, instead of a nameless gritty sort of charcoal that somehow managed to taste only slightly better than it looked. Which was really rather awful.

Neither could any of the girls remember Suyin worrying about home cooked meals when they actually lived at home.

Said matriarch entered the kitchen, the sound of her approaching footsteps made them retreat into a more appropriate position but there was a lingering closeness there, and a flush on their cheeks that no distance could hide. Suyin either chose to ignore it or failed to notice all together. Opal felt somewhat downhearted at how quickly Kuvira had stepped out of her arms and back into that smooth professional demeanor she normally operated within, but even so Opal could see how difficult Kuvira found the transition today.

It's not that she didn't understand her, the other girl was not Suyin's real daughter and Opal wasn't sure if that made it easier or harder. One thing was certain, the last thing Kuvira wanted to feel like was a snake in the grass who had slithered her way into their family home and seduced their daughter.

It was understandable enough. Who knew what they could lose if that is how Suyin reacted to their relationship. The worst case scenario was that Suyin denied them her support and they would be forced to leave Teotech or choose between the rest of the family and their relationship.

"Ah! Coffee what a wondrous idea Kuvira. You always were my favorite daughter, much more considerate than this little rascal." She ruffled Opals short bob, making it look uncharacteristically unruly. Opal pouted.

Kuvira tried really hard not to be bitter about Suyin referring to her as her daughter, it always unsettled her a little. Sure it had turned out for the best, they couldn't exactly be involved if they were legally sisters, but even so there was a time when there was nothing she wanted more than to have Suyin adopt her officially.

Kuvira cringed a little but forced a small chuckle.

"Well then, in an effort to redeem myself I will just have to banish you two to the living room while I take over." Opal said, a grin on her face. She gave Kuvira's shoulder a squeeze and a look that told the older woman everything she needed to hear, _I know it hurts, just stick with it baby and I'll make it up to you._

Kuvira took Opal's hand and kissed it. "There is still some cake in the fridge babe."

The nickname slipped from her lips before she realized it, her tone had been wrong. It came out still entangled in their previous intimacy.

Suyin threw a backwards glance at them, slowing her steps a little. For the first time since she arrived Kuvira got the feeling that Suyin was looking at them. Not her normal perfunctory look but a deep inquisitive stare that unravelled everything.

The casual way they stood close together, the redness and glint of saliva on Kuvira's neck, the way Kuvira dropped Opal's hand as soon as she noticed Suyin looking, the way both of them looked at her like they were afraid of something. That deer caught in the headlights look was surprisingly familiar, had Suyin ever really noticed how often they carried it?

Her brow knitted, "Maybe you should both prepare the coffee, shall I wait at the dining table?"

"Yeah mom, you wait there." Opal said.

"Maybe we do have more to discuss this evening after all." Kuvira added, the resolution in her voice made Opal quiver a little and Suyin noticed them sharing a glance. The kind she had shared herself with Bataar many a times. One that communicated without words between two people who knew each other better perhaps than they knew anyone else.

As she sat at the cozy dining table, round and made to seat four or even six people in a pinch, Suyin felt for the first time that she was a guest in an apartment belong to someone else. It was a curious emotion to feel in a place she regarded as sort of an extension of her own home.

With no little amount of horror she realized the implications of her suspicions.

A good ten minutes passed before Opal brought a tray of cups, saucers and small plates. Kuvira brought up the rear a large french press and an ornate metal platter with the majority of a cake on it. Did Kuvira bend that platter? It was really quite well made, the sharp angles complimented the creator well. Kuvira really was a very talented bender, and such a caring person. She had come a long way since Suyin took her in and Opal was allowed at least some of that credit. The two of them had always been thick as thieves.

Something was different about them and Suyin realized that they looked relaxed. When was the last time she had seen that? Could she even remember how her daughter looked with that easy smile on her face? And her foster child, Kuvira really was a handsome woman, and so attentive. The casual way she held out Opal's chair, and the hesitant way Opal had obviously been waiting for her to do so without seeming impatient was very sweet.

Suyin felt like a fool, which was really something, because it had been years since anyone had succeeded in making her feel out of her element.

Kuvira took Opal's hand and they smiled at each other before turning their gazes to Suyin in perfect unison.

"Mom." Opal began.

She didn't look very confident anymore, or relaxed. Kuvira ran her thumb over her knuckles. It looked like Opal was squeezing her hand quite tightly but she did not let go.

"Do you want…"

"No." Opal interrupted Kuvira. "I need to be the one who says this. Mom. Me and Kuvira are together. Like girlfriends... We're girlfriends. And we have been, for some time."

Suyin had her legs crossed and the top foot was furiously tapping the air. She looked from one to the other, not quite sure who to address first.

Both girls bravely held her gaze but she could see the fear there, the determination to see this through come what may.

"How long?" Suyin asked.

"Three years, maybe."

Suyin's face fell. "You kept this secret for three years?"

Kuvira looked guilty, her and Opal had always been in the same grade due to her living on the streets and missing out on some years of school, only two or three by Suyin's estimate though. She could have advanced to a higher grade but something kept her back, something beautiful, with tanned skin, pale green eyes and thick dark brown hair.

"It's a bit more complicated than that. We've been girlfriends for three years, but I'm ashamed to say it began before Opal was even of age. I take full responsibility of course, being older than her I should have known better than..."

"Don't you dare take the blame for this. I was more than able to decide for myself that I wanted to be with you." Opal hissed.

Kuvira raised an eyebrow, "really? I don't recall it being quite so cut and dry."

"Maybe it wasn't, but I'll never regret what we did."

"You were 13 Opal. I was three years your senior and…" Kuvira averted her eyes, a single tear escaped her careful control.

Opal pulled her close, "we talked about this Vira, you didn't take advantage of me." She cooed into the older girls ear, a few tears fell but Kuvira managed not to sob.

Suyin felt a bit embarrassed to see this, of course she knew what Kuvira was talking about but it was never something she brought up. When Suyin found her walking the streets there had been clear signs of molestation.

Suyin herself hadn't felt able to deal with that kind of issues but she had made sure Kuvira had the best therapist money could buy, she had asked her about it too. Several times in fact, but the girl had shut tighter than a clam anytime she tried, just hearing that Opal had found a way through her shield made Suyin feel a rush of pride for her daughter.

"Even so, I wouldn't say there is anything intrinsically wrong with having an intimate relationship between a 13 and a 16 year old." Suyin said, her voice was careful. She did very much want Kuvira to open up about her life before the Beifongs but right now the matter of their relationship seemed a bit more pressing.

Opal gave her mother a weak smile, her fingers stroked Kuvira's hair in a familiar soothing manner, "it was me who seduced her more than the other way around I think. Since we were kids Vira was always my knight in shining armor. Standing up for me, helping me, being my best friend. I think I always knew it was meant to be us. Nothing has ever felt so right or so easy."

Kuvira smiled a little, her forehead was still resting into Opal's shoulder. "Well there was that thing with Korra."

Opal's face flushed beet red and Suyin laughed.

"Korra is a beautiful girl." The Matriarch said, as if that was enough reason to satisfy her.

Kuvira straightened out and wiped her eyes on the sleeve of her shirt. "I apologize, for what it is worth, that we kept this secret for so long. I don't know how we can earn your forgiveness but I hope it remains in the scope of future possibilities."

Suyin reached over and grabbed Kuvira's hand, "no need to be so formal Kuvira. There is nothing to forgive. I am a little shocked, truth be told. But when I think about it, it doesn't make me angry. I think I can even say I am kinda happy for you two."

Now it was Opal's turn to cry, the med student didn't cry the silent stoic tears her girlfriend had, but burst into a hysterical sort of sob that initially tugged a little at Kuvira's mouth, almost forming a smile before her empathy kicked in full scale and made her wrap her arms tightly around the smaller girl.

Suying watched them, her smile was less arrogant than usual, and more motherly. Suyin had always been a good mother in her own way. She reached over and took her daugthers hands.

 **A/N: With this in place, the "original" story has been totally uploaded in it's new edited state. If you've re-read it, I am very grateful. For it really was a hard bit of labor to re-examine my own work so closely and admit to all the mistakes I made. There are still many, I rely purely on your indulgence in overlooking them. Thank you.**


	10. The lies of our undoing

**A/N: The story has been mostly rewritten. The most significant change for you as a reader is the change in chapters. All chapters have been cut in length which means that the initial 4 chapters now span 9 chapters instead with chapters 3-4-5 being more or less completely new. I hope you will enjoy the edited story as well as the new and upcoming chapters (11 will be uploaded one of the coming days.)**

 **Please enjoy this new chapter.**

 **Chapter 10: The lies of our undoing**

Asami's bathroom was immense and luxurious in a spartan sort of way.

Nothing like the kind I've seen on tv with flat screens and gold fixtures that spoke of new money and the wallet itch that comes with it. Rather it was open and elegant, designed with an easy grace that testified to the owners good taste.

The tiles were probably imported from somewhere in the earth kingdom, cast in the ass cracks of virgins and hand burned by firebending masters wearing only the purest silk kimonos and moustaches soaked in oil so refined you gotta wring it from rocks. That sounded like something rich people would buy. Expensive materials who had been made through immense hardship without any particular increase to their quality. They would be sold because every tile or hand polished piece of wood was sold with a story and a bragging right.

Instead of a shower stall there was an open pit with a massive shower head that gave me the impression of standing outside during a heavy rainstorm. The hard patter of of the drizzle pouring unto stone was ear deafening, like the emptying of clouds as their water fell lazily towards the ground from colossal height. It added a natural component of something wild and haunting to the refined elegance.

I never liked taking showers because of that, that haunting claustrophobic feeling from being locked in, blind and deaf. When my mind conjured the worst horrors and paranoia came so easily. The breath of chilled wind against my heated skin like the passage of ghosts. Immaterial but laden with meaning and intentions.

I moved to dry myself with a fluffy towel, it was soft and felt like it had never been washed once, which it probably hadn't.

Asami entered without knocking and for one hopeful moment I thought she'd come for me. I'd never been a shy creature and now I felt myself becoming downright exhiobionistic in my eagerness to show off what she was missing out on by being such a closet cased daddy's girl. I didn't bother letting the towel hide anything from her as I slowly faced her in all my naked glory, surreptitiously flexing my muscle to make them impossibly more defined. A playful smirk tugging at the corners of my mouth.

Sadly Asami was only holding a change of clothes in her hand which she carefully put down on a padded seat while avoiding my eyes and the jagged edges of my smirk as much as possible, but at the same time desperately failing to avoid the rest of me.

I snickered and she blushed lightly.

She swallowed thickly before speaking, "I'll order us something to eat, feel free to wear this." She finally managed to cast her eyes down but her voice seemed infinitely small in the presence of the cold ceramics.

"Mighty kind of you." I called after her retreating form, a smug smile plastered all over my face that lasted until I smelled the faint scent of Asami on the plain white t-shirt she'd given me and sighed with pleasure.

It's damn hard to be smug when you are so pathetically into someone.

The reluctance she displayed was a stab at the two most delicate facets of my being, my heart and my pride. I desperately wanted her to want me back but I felt inadequate and vastly out of her league. Like she was a whole new species and I wasn't even sure I was speaking her language even if I was trying in my own fucked up way.

"So I've been thinking." I said between bites of the Spicy Seaweed Stir fry Asami had ordered. It was delicious, I had expected something like Earth kingdom pizza or even Fire Nation fried rice but naturally Asami had her own ideas about what constituted take out; getting the lobby boy to fetch a three course menu from a local organic restaurant. I didn't even know we had a lobby boy or that you could get fresh Tigerseal this far from the arctic. Come to think of it I'm sure we definitely do not have a lobby boy, which begs the question of who actually went on this food run for us and how lazy is this girl even.

"Congratulations."

"Funny… " I swallowed my meat too soon and it hurt all the way down. "Why don't you let me take you out on a date?"

Her eyes went a little wide. She must've known it was coming sometimes and I wasn't in the mood to play that game.

"A freak motorcycle accident left you without nether regions so you are really a half cyborg?" I jested, trying to guess what excuse she'd run with. A strained smile, hers.

"We already had this conversation. I can't date anyone."

"That your dad knows about."

"You really think I do anything that my dad doesn't know about?"

"That's creepy."

She smiled, less strained but nothing close to relaxed.

"It's what he does. I can't tell him what to do."

"But you can find the loopholes. I'm a girl, and frankly, incredibly charming. He'll adore me as your new best friend and he'd never even know about all the smooching we'll be doing."

A laugh. Genuine. I smiled victoriously.

"Listen. You said your dad hated Mako, but he seemed to think the two of them hit it off perfectly fine. You even said so yourself. Clearly he can be charmed if Mako managed it." Great, now even I was talking about Mako, fucking idiot.

She shrugged.

"He still didn't approve then, even after Mako impressed him?"

"Hah. Yeah. Didn't like having a kid 'lecture him in his own house. As soon as Mako left he went on a tirade. But he always treated Mako with respect, to his face at least."

"Sounds like he's kind of a two faced asshole."

Asami regarded me with disinterest, her face wasn't outright hostile but she looked a bit like she wondering if I was being deliberately provocative by insulting her father.

"My father knows when it's better to be professional and when you can be yourself."

"Yeah but his real self doesn't sound too appealing though does it?"

"You don't know shit about my father, what he's been through. He watched my mom get burned alive Korra. What do you think that does to a person?"

"I don't know. But I'm not sure it leaves them very capable of controlling the most important company on the planet."

Asami's anger dissipated as quickly as it had flared. "I agree."

I pushed my luck. "Which is why you are putting up with him. You know he could be dangerous."

Much to my surprise Asami laughed heartily at this. "Could be dangerous? Korra my father is financing the anti-bender campaign he is as good as an arch villain to you right now." She laughed again and it was two steps off lunacy to my ears. "If things had been different there could be a war going on, it's still a possibility. Do you think I care who I can date in comparison to that?"

When her laughter died it left her face very solemn, like she wasn't totally sure why she'd found that so funny. She looked back out the window a little more chagrined and a lot grimmer than before.

"I guess you have a point. It's very noble what you're doing." I admitted.

She poured herself a glass of water from a pitcher. The condensation made the glass foggy and slippery, idly I called the water to me and made it twirl between my fingers in an effort to diffuse the unbelievable tension in the room.

"Maybe you should be asking what you can do to help instead of chasing tail," she said.

"I'm only chasing your tail, and you know that the Avatar hasn't been involved in politics for hundreds of years, who am I to change that?"

"You should probably ask yourself that." Her eyes cut into me and the voice hits me like a gut punch, yanking the air from my lungs in an uncompromising tug. The water fell, soaking my borrowed pants.

I regarded her flatly. Who was she to put such expectations on my life?

"Look at us sharing and shit. Isn't that just precious?"

She knew I was just avoiding the conversation so she said nothing and an odd sort of silence descended on us. Leaving us to breathe the fumes of our aggression towards each other. I found it was choking me and wished I'd stayed outside instead of inviting myself into her home like a guest.

I have enough on my plate with Pema, school and my pro bending. I never asked to be the Avatar and the world sure as shit wasn't asking for me to be it. So what gave me the right to suddenly decide that they should? Asami wouldn't understand, she was born into privilege and she never had to think that maybe she shouldn't have been.

We sat in silence for a bit, not awkward but introspective. I could tell she was listening to the sound of the rain hammering the glass walls, when a lightning bolt crackled, she turned her head slightly to witness it strike. There was no smile or anything I just got the feeling she'd spend a lot of moments like that, quietly watching and waiting for something. A new beginning or maybe the end of something old.

"I used to think I wouldn't live past 28" I said, and she chuckled like she understood how insane that was.

"Why?" Asami asked.

I don't know if I ever really thought about it, it was just something I used to say because it was weird and true and somehow said more about who I used to be than who I was now.

"If I had to say why, I think it is because of who I was. I used to evaluate risks very carefully, even if I didn't much care about taking them."

"So you decided to take every risk you could and die young?"

I smiled, and pushed her cigarettes with my foot "You know those warning labels they used to have on here? That said every cigarette is 7 or 11 minutes off your life or something?"

She nodded.

"I used to assign numbers to everything I did like that. Eating a McDouble, 15 minutes, having unprotected sex 30 minutes."

"You must have eaten a lot of junk food then."

"Can't say I have."

She laughed roughly, "now I really want that date," she said dryly.

"It's a standing offer.

I slurped the last of my dinner and Asami brought out dessert, she didn't ask if I was ready because it wasn't necessary. I am always ready for more food.

There was something about Asami. A certain kind of loneliness that had grown and festered inside her until I wasn't quite sure if the girl had ever gone without it. It lay about her shoulders like a cape, a warning not to come any closer.

It is not that Asami as a person was unapproachable, she was witty and intelligent and an excellent conversationalist. it was simply that she carried with her that mantle of loneliness that warned anyone trying to get close to her that here was a person who prefered solitude to bending her own principles. A person who know what they wanted and how they wanted to get there. I felt a pang of jealousy that Mako had somehow gotten through to her. Would she really have given it all up for him?

The Asami I had met back then might have, but this one seemed wholly without compromise. " _Money doesn't buy love."_ She'd said that once and I wondered if she had really loved Mako when she said it " _He does seem like the kinda guy who's just there really."._

"Did you think Mako was gonna change your dad's mind about benders?"

She didn't look at me but keep her gaze on the city outside, a gentle evening rain was distorting our view but it was still beautiful in its own right. Glaring lights searing hot white beams into the darkened sky. "I don't know. But I always thought it would take a person like him, who was observant and warm. One who could show him that power doesn't necessarily change a person."

I wiggled my eyebrows and stretched my arms back on the couch in a failed attempt at looking nonchalant.

Asami took note but didn't seem very impressed.

Oh well.


	11. Rejoice! A lie is dead

**Chapter 11: Rejoice! A lie is dead.**

Kuvira looked perfectly disgruntled when she opened the door. She was naked apart from the rumpled bed sheet wrapped around her and her hair was falling free from the tight braid she hadn't undone before going to bed.

"You have a key Korra." She stated dryly.

Surprisingly enough she lit into a wide grin and pulled me into a hug. Kuvira didn't pull people into hugs, especially when she looked like she'd just done a couple of thousand rotations in the dryer.

"I take it things went well with Suyin?" I could feel every contour of her hard body and it comforted me.

She nodded and pulled me inside, "you better come in, I think Opal might clobber me if I tell you without her."

Opal was draped over their bed butt naked, her face buried in a pillow and her short bob hiding her face from view. She made no attempt to cover herself up when I entered, she gave an exhausted grunt that made me and Kuvira laugh.

I was really happy that instead of making things awkward between us, the night we'd all spent together in this bed just seemed to have broken down the last few barriers. My eye traveled over the faint bruises and bite marks riddled all over her backside, some were familiar others looked freshly made.

Kuvira threw one half of her sheet over Opal and nudged her with a toe.

"I guess she'll just be listening then," her eyes scanned me, "what the hell happened to you anyway?"

My face muscles grew taut with grief, I didn't want to spoil this moment of happiness for them.

"Ran into Asami Sato of all people."

"Oho," Opal said into the bed with a bit of hard won enthusiasm.

Kuvira high fived the hand she had lazily lifted and smirked at me. "Explains the clothes, and why you didn't call whining about Suyin taking ages to leave."

I grimaced, "I was hoping she'd let me crash, but she threw me out."

"This time!" Opal said.

"Probably won't be a next time, she just took me in because I was being pathetic in the elevator."

Opal and Kuvira smiled at each other.

"Won't be necessary anymore. We told Suyin about us."

I lifted the sheet and looked at Kuvira's bare ass, "She hasn't metal bended you a new asshole I see."

Kuvira swatted my hand way in annoyance but it didn't break her shit eating grin. "She's more likely to metalbend us wedding rings right now."

Opal groaned.

"Seems like she can't wait for us to finish here and come home, Zaofu's new power couple she called us. Exciting isn't it?"

Opal groaned louder.

"I'm so happy for you guys. It couldn't have worked out better."

"Yeah. Things are really starting to look up huh? We can finally be out and you can get a piece of Asami to break you out of your year long moping session."

"I haven't been moping!"

"Opal, tell her she has been moping."

"It's true." She confirmed sleepily, "You've been moping," she lifted her head to look at me she caught wind of my troubled expression. "What's wrong Korra?"

I gulped. I was exhausted and I kept thinking about Pema and Asami, feeling guilty about both and not sure how to handle either.

I rubbed my neck nervously. "I'm sorry really, to be the bringer of bad news when you guys are having your…" I gestured vaguely at them and the bed, which had seen better days and bore several rather telling wet spots that I diligently avoided mentioning. "But I stopped by the Caelum's tonight. Pema's ill."

"Oh." Kuvira said lamely, then her mouth clamped shut. She never was good at dealing with personal issues, discomfort radiated off her in thick waves, but Opal snapped to attention, pushing her useless girlfriend out of the way and assuming a position of comfort. "Seriously ill? What's wrong? Does it have anything to do with that back pain she's been having?"

I saw the concern, and the fire lit there, a million little complexities in her posture and voice that conveyed her sincere concern. Her mind churning with thoughts and possibilities, she might only be in her first year but Opal had been a self student of medicine ever since she had the first of her many many hypochondriac episodes.

One thing I always really liked about Opal was her ability to absorb herself into something, even if it's sometimes obsessive and frankly unhealthy for her. You don't see a lot of people like that, who can ask something or meet an acquaintance and be 100% legitimately interested in them and anything they have to say. I seen Opal have hour long conversations about Science Fiction novels, when I know for a fact she was a poetry gal and she didn't have the faintest clue who Frank Herbert or Isaac Asimov was.

Sure people pay attention well enough, but most of them would have forgotten it by the next time they ran into that person, not Opal though. Her brain was outfitted with an endless memory bank for idly chatter. She absorbed everything around her like an energetic, overeager sponge.

Heck, the way she let me and Vira drone on about probending even I would probably have had to tune it out eventually, but Opal soldiered on, never looking bored and always asking just the right question.

"I don't know much yet, but it doesn't look good."

Opal pulled me into a hug, a very distracting hug since the only thing separating us was the thin layer of Asami's white T-shirt. Thankfully I was feeling a bit too somber for lewd thoughts. Kuvira seemed to have found the emergency file on grief buried somewhere in her system and joined the hug. "It's gonna be alright." She said.

And all I could think was. How the fuck do you know.

Some weeks later Opal burst back into the apartment.

It was evening and much too late for her to still be out, but Opal was the kind of try-hard who liked to get involved in campus life and always had the inside scoop about cool things to do around town if you weren't too bothered about possibly getting into trouble.

She rushed in brandishing two identical fliers.

"Enough studying!" She proclaimed loudly.

Kuvira looked up, her hand automatically going to her neck to work out some of the kinks.

Opal crossed to her and gave her a peck on the lips.

She then held the fliers high and gazed upon them with reverence, deliberately exaggerating her movements for comical effect.

"The student body is holding a massive celebration on the flats with RCCC! Basically it's a two day festival, with tents and performers and all kinds of activities you can do while drunk."

Kuvira raised an eyebrow, "this just says activities."

Opal snatched back the flier, "of course it does, but it doesn't say you can't be drunk."

"This fine print on the bottom says alcohol will be served in limited amounts to attendees above 18."

Opal snatched the second flier, "first of all, how did you even get this, second, quit being such a spoilsport. What's the fun of a gigantic 300 metre slip and slide if you aren't totally plastered?"

I lit up, "gigantic slip and slide? We're going." I nodded vigorously.

Kuvira shot me a glare, but it softened the moment she saw my puppy dog excitement. "Right," she said.

She's been a lot nicer to me since i told them about Pema.

Opal threw her arms around Kuvira. A smile as big as mine plastered all over her face. "You're the best Vira."

They hugged for a moment, before Opal shot up again and rushed for the door. "I'll be back in a moment!"

"Where are you going?" Kuvira asked.

She flicked one of the fliers in a 'hello' gesture, "to deliver this to Asami of course."

She winked at me and hurried out the door.

I might have gone white with horror.

"Asami? Mako won't like that."

I pulled a face, "no, he definitely won't. She isn't going to say yes anyway, let's not worry yet."

Asami had been as cold to me in lectures as she was before our little dinner date, Opal's definition not mine. I thought maybe we would be friends now, or at least acquaintances who could share a bit of small talk about our impossible workload or poke fun at Professor Gurker's incredible amount of warts.

So far nothing. We didn't speak and she still wouldn't borrow me her damn notes.

Kuvira turned back to her neatly organized desk, "I would have thought you wanted her to come though," she said casually.

I clicked my pen and stared out the wall to wall window, past the balcony and further out towards the blanket of stars gentle floating atop the modest skyline. It wasn't always this bare. Three years ago a massive earthquake ripped through the western continent laying waste to the unprepared skyscrapers of Republic City, as well as a fair portion of the government housing in the lower reaches. The Caelum family home on Airbender Island was completely destroyed and the property declared unfit for habitation. Somewhere beyond where their new home, just a little further and you'd be at the flats.

Kuvira looked at my solemn expression.

"C'mon Avatar, Iets make some dinner."

Opal was looking very happy, when she returned.

"I'll take it by your smug face that Asami agreed to come?" Kuvira said, she was chopping carrots and hadn't even turned to look at Opal's face. I looked down at her bare feet and grinned, Coach Lin would've been proud. Opal was indeed looking very smug as she sauntered into the kitchen area, a single flier in her hand. She fanned herself dramatically. "Why ever would you say that," she said playfully.

Kuvira grinned and hoisted herself on the counter so Opal could get a good look on her bare feet.

Opal giggled, and rested her face in her hands. "She's letting you use the stove?"

"Under adult supervision only," Kuvira said sharply.

I smacked her with the spatula. That bitch.

"That's really unsanitary."

"So are those feet," I said, wrinkling my nose.

The flats were this huge area beyond the city borders.

Couple of times a year it hosted some huge event or other, the Republic Music Festival, the infamous Cirque De'Sokkai and a seasonal market for all kinds of secondhand and handcrafted goods.

By the time the actual event drew near it became obvious that this was no longer a small university gathering.

When the weekend loomed, more than 10 artists had announced they'd play. Most of them were our own homegrown Dj's and a few bands on the verge of breaking through, plus a few who already had.

The snowball was rolling.

The entire school was atwitter with brittle hope that we were about to lay down the building blocks of a great interpolative adventure between ourselves and RCCC.

Before you could even say 'awful idea' the RMF people started breathing down our necks, understandably of course, we didn't have proper sanitation, security or anything like that.

By the time the City Council cracked down on what they had been made to believe was a small gathering between schools, funding was secured through a few choice sponsorships with Cabbage Corp and a few local businesses. A thousand students pledged clean up crew to keep costs down. Opal said she didn't expected more than half to show.

The effort was enough to prove that our event was serious. Councillor Tarlokk personally signed our permission slips in the face of a fuming RMF director.

Kuvira hadn't stopped smirking for a week. She'd probably be a good lawyer one day.

All I had to do was make it through another guileless thursday and I'd be shitfaced for two entire days.


	12. The best lies are told in good faith

**Chapter 12: The best lies are told in good faith.**

 **A/N:** Writing is hard for me at the moment, both because I have a lot of distracting projects and because I got promoted at work. Have patience and enjoy this particular interlude of precious time spent with the Caellums. Next two chapters are basically done, it's gonna be big. I'll probably update again really soon I just don't have time to edit three chapters tonight. If you're wondering if this story is ever going anywhere I'm happy to say I've done a rough outline and I may even stick to it, so yay?

"Thanks for driving me coach."

The high rise apartments loomed some way in the distance. We gently rolled by one and two family houses with their clogged gutters and muddy streaks. Every crag and crevice packed with two century stamped dirt, not a blade of grass in sight. The trademark thistles grew instead, a reddish shade of green nearly knee high in length. If you looked carefully you'd catch hints of stone jutting free beneath the dirt caked sidewalks.

"I was going anyway. You're not the worst company I ever had in here." Lin said, the old mush.

I swatted at her arm and gave her a wink, "Lots of bum dates huh?"

She looked annoyed.

"Don't make me change my mind."

A lazy grin lit up my face, I swear I could see something like amusement tug at the corner of her mouth in the mirror.

Acting like a hardass to one of her proteges before driving her former rival to chemo was so typical Lin. You just know it's all face when she looks at Pema and she gets that determined expression were her jaw clenches and all her tendons grow so taut you think they're gonna snap any moment, that tells me there was nothing she wouldn't do to make sure her friend saw her kids grow up.

I know Lin would even take her sickness if she could, but she couldn't so she drove her to chemo three times a week because the Caellum didn't have a car. And she made me sneak in groceries because she knew money was real tight and Tenzin got super stubborn about accepting help. Tough as nails Lin with her jaw always clenches because she just cares so much about everything and nothing ever really lives up to what she invests in them. Not me, not letting Tenzin go and be happy with someone else, not her career as a pro bending coach even if she is very good at it.

Today we stopped at O-Mart, Lin made me load all kinds of necessities into the cart w´hile she pushed it around. The way she barked orders at me made me feel like we were back in the gym, she's got this way of making you feel like you're doing an abysmal job at damn near anything. Maybe I was though, I never thought I was perfect. Not even at bending and that is the best thing about me.

There was a knot in my chest because I knew Tenzin wouldn't accept all these gifts and I didn't want him to be angry at her. She was just trying her best to deal with a really shitty situation.

We all did.

It was the worst kind of day.

One where the sky churned and rolled over itself.

You could never tell from where the sun was shining from, if it even was, it could be dead behind that grey thickness for all you knew.

A thunderbolt split the sky in twain without any kind of warning, it cracked like an egg, spilling it's insides on the pavement in fat drops.

The water trucks wouldn't have to drive tonight and the streets would be oh so lonesome in their post downpour desolation, it's normal parishioners seeking refuge in their warm cozy living rooms. Far away from the crunch of sand under their boots and muddy brown rims on the bottom of their trouser legs. The ones that washed out so poorly and always left the fabric dried out and stiff.

In precious few minutes the layers of dust had been soaked.

Gritty rivers of brown snaked into drains, into cellars, down every incline towards the city. The harbor would be dyed brown by tonight and the following morning all the fishermen would take a day off while the fish swam out, they didn't like the dusty brown water after rainy days.

I was soaked the moment I stepped out of Coach Lin's car, and positively freezing once we had pulled the shopping bags from the backseat. I warmed myself with an aura of warm air while Lin barged ahead, eager to be back inside.

The gentle rumble of the thunder blurred out any sound but the slap of footsteps as we climbed the short hill to the high rise.

"What's with all the bags?" Tenzin asked.

"We brought dinner, the kids can help me prepare it while you're gone," I all but shouted.

I was normally so good at casual lying, but today I felt like a bundle of tightly wound nerves and fear, every untrue word tumbled off my tongue in a false unconvincing cadence I didn't recognize. Tenzin accepted our entry without any further question, he looked worse than I ever saw him before, like he didn't have nothing left in him to argue. I raced the bags to the kitchen before he could really take in how much we brought.

My insides began to uncoil the moment I saw Pema.

She was actually here. Unharmed. Alive.

I kept thinking she wouldn't be.

I kissed her forehead and she gifted me with one of her small unassuming smiles. She wasn't a very exuberant person. I'm wondering if it was very petty of me to hope she would become one? With death breathing down your neck, shouldn't you try and live it up as much as you could?

"Korra," she said, and just by speaking my name we'd already shared so much. She had that ability you know, to say more with silence than most people could with words. It's a highly treasured ability I thought. The way she said it meant, Are you well and I've missed you. All in one simple word. My answering smile said I was fine, likewise and how about you, to her.

"I have a surprise for you," I said once the moment passed.

She smiled, "I'll be surprised if you manage to cook without burning anything."

I hid my burned fingertips from her mirthful gaze. I would have healed them, I just hadn't gotten around to it yet.

"Why does everyone think I'm a walking fire hazard? I can bend every element and your biggest scare is me causing a house fire so big I somehow couldn't put out?!" I huffed.

Pema chuckled, she was all smiles beneath the slight sag of her skin, "I meant the food dear. But thank you for sharing," she patted my hand, "You're a good girl Korra."

"And a great bender! The best some would say." My voice sounded a little bit hysterical.

She smiled benevolently.

"I believe you promised me a surprise?"

I fiddled for a moment with extracting the very precious laps of paper from my pocket.

"A friend of a friend is dancing in the new ballet, she got you and Tenzin tickets to the show."

"The new one?"

"None other."

I handed her the tickets. Thick glossy paper with 'Fall of the Fire Nation' scrawled across it in slanted gold letters.

There was no friend, middle aged women can be really stubborn about these things. As bad as their male counterparts.

I eyed Tenzin, he was holding Pema's coat, his own hanging loosely from his frame. A small smile played on his lips. "That was very nice of you Korra."

I gave him a thumbs up.

"Now scram please, I have a dinner to burn!"

The kids came home way too late. I'd burned all the food by then but they seemed so happy to see me they didn't care.

We ate together at the cracked laminate of the kitchen table then Jinora helped everyone with their homework, including me.

You'd be surprised how gifted a 16 year old girl can be with differential equations.

"So this beam here is raised 8cm shorter from the same force due to gravity and another 0.432cm due to air resistance. Which means…"

"We have to increase the length of the movement by…" I tapped the paper a few times, "5 degrees. For a uniform result."

Jinora nodded, "You got it. Your practical is getting better, how about the theory?"

"Trying, Asami still won't borrow me her notes."

"You could take your own, or ask someone else."

I let my head fall down on the paper, earning a small ink smudge on my nose, "I can barely follow what Gurker is saying when I don't get distracted by notes. And Asami has the BEST notes. She draws and does this neat little thing where you can click on words to open definitions. There is even different colours and notes for when things relate to other concepts. She could teach this class Jinora."

"Sounds like you need to turn up the charm and make her WANT to give you those notes," she poked my shoulder hard, "Offer to cook for her and copy them while she's retching from the food poisoning."

I groaned into the table. Raava damned Jinora.

"Don't you have homework as well?"

"I did it all during recess."

I looked up at her, "I really hate you."

She flapped her hand in my face indifferently, "all siblings hate each other."

"Would you two shut up? I'm trying to work here."

Jinora blew Meelo's paper across the room.

"HEY!" Ikky screamed, sounding thoroughly outraged, "Do mine too."

Thirty minutes later I was almost done sorting my notes from Ikkys cursive training, all of them filled to the edge with doodles of butterflies, as well as Meelo's tightly written essay about that time we went to the circus and how he wanted to be a Sprechstallsmeister and wear a top hat every day. The whole ordeal was made very difficult by how similar his scrawl was to my own. Maybe Ikky could give me a course on proper penmanship?

Meelo and Ikky both had those big round eyes, bright as sunshine, that told me they were seconds from going hyper and making my job as babysitter about ten times worse. In an attempt to curb their energy I pulled out a board game, a ragged thing with the cardboard ripped at every angle, there were other newer ones in the stack, but I knew this one always hit home.

Jinora sighed and rested her head in her hand, elbow perched on the table next to a half drunk cup of tea, "you always pick that game."

"I'm a creature of habit."

"Korra's a creature," Meelo shouted, toothy grin wide with excitement. It was his favourite too.

They set up the pieces and I managed the bank because Ikky always cheated and Jinora made people ask politely before performing any transaction and who really had time for something like that when you're getting crushed by your siblings and you need some quick cash? Meelo was excused because his idea of counting was to give people a stack and say 'I think there's three there' there would nearly always be twice as much or not nearly enough because he'd given you all tens when you needed thousands.

A very quick game of monopoly, which means somewhere around three hours later, Jinora was winning and being infuriatingly smug about it. Meelo had checked out and was playing idly with the spare pieces and Ikky was insisting on telling increasingly long winded anecdotes about every fictional address her piece landed on. Including but not limited to naming every occupant in every house and insisting we double dipped in our playtime by pretending to be a hotel receptionist and well-to-do real estate owner checking in whenever she landed on Jinora's property.

Ten minutes later Ikky gracefully admitted defeat and Meelo flipped the board in memoriam of one particular heated game were Jinora got very upset about losing.

"You doing okay kid?" I asked Jinora.

All of us were bunched up on the couch, watching some late show, Ikky had her head in my lap snoring softly while I absentmindedly stroked her hair.

Being a big sister could be alright sometimes.

Jinora leaned her head against my shoulder and sighed.

Sometimes I forgot she was just a sixteen year old girl.

"Everything is just so different without you here."

I wrapped my arm around her and squeezed, "Jin, I'm trying my best, I just can't be here all the time even if I want to."

"I know. I just wish you could," she said, my heart clenched at how small her voice sounded.

"I'm gonna carry Ikky to bed, alright? Then we'll have some time just the two of us."

"Alright."

She hugged me tightly all the way in, Ikky really was at her cutest when she was half asleep. She didn't talk then. I placed her in the bunk below Meelo's, she'd grow out of it soon and move into my old bunk. Rohan was getting too big for his crib anyway. Jinora might miss me but I'd outgrown this place years ago.

Still. That doesn't mean I can't miss it too.


	13. Lie once, Lie again

**Chapter 13: Lie once, lie again.**

"No way."

"Yes way," Opal retorted. Her expression was stern, challenging anyone to question her decision. "It is about time you people begin taking responsibility for the people you introduce us to! The vote is unanimous, we like Asami and she's coming." She jabbed her finger violently at everyone around her, we all shrank away from her accusatory finger and the accompanying death glare. Asami wasn't the first case of temporary substitute or hangers on to our little group. We just never fought for any of them before.

Bolin cringed, "Shouldn't Mako have a say in this, it's his ex after all."

Opal glared at him, Kuvira and I tried to look everywhere else.

Our food was served, the silence was a little oppressive but from what I could tell Mako had already given in. He could be an argumentative son of a bitch but it was obvious Opal cornered him some time earlier because he didn't object. He just slurped his noodles with a sullen expression, refusing to look at any of us. I almost felt bad for him, if I didn't wanna see Asami so badly I might have.

Narooks was bustling around us. The remodel of the arena and gentrification of the entire harbor area drew in a whole new crowd, young people with money to spend, on the lookout for an 'authentic' experience of southern cuisine.

That was the fashion right now anyway, everything had to be as real as possible. Crummy was yummy, apparently.

The place was chock full of well-to-do college kids and twenty-somethings in their vintage clothes, traditional clothing was coming back in style and my worn out watertribe pelts and soft leather trousers drew a fair bit of attention.

I heard one kid whisper to her friend how 'authentic' they looked and I right about gagged. Kyoshi wouldn't be sitting in a noodle shop like a nobody, taking that shit. She'd bust some heads.

"How's Pema?" Bolin asked.

The table sighed collectively, this was afterall a topic we all agreed on. Cancer sucks.

"She's coping. There's still a while to go with the chemo, so it's too early to be optimistic right now." I informed them, slightly dejected that the news weren't better.

"Can't believe you got Coach Lin to drive her. She isn't exactly the… Well you know." Kuvira grimaced and made a gesture that insinuated we all knew what track she was on. Lin had been a bit of a hot topic around Teotech, and the Beifongs probably knew better than anyone.

"She's okay really," Opal cut her off. Always to the rescue even though Lin hardly ever gave her the time of day, but that was Opal, always trying to find the silver lining.

"Maybe she's just trying to score some brownie points so she can swoop in on the grieving widower, in case she doesn't make it," Mako said.

"No way, who'd want to date an old guy with five kids, a bald old guy."

Opal ruffled Kuvira's hair, "dunno, baldness is a sign of virility isn't it?"

"Gross."

"Five kids is a better sign I'd say." Mako deadpanned.

I didn't laugh with them but I tried my best to smile, talking about Pema reminded me of everything I wanted to forget. The frailty and failings of parents who left us in body or soul so soon before their time. The short lived life and love and all those things we held dear, how all the lines that connected us were sand that crumbled and slipped between the fingers the more you tried to hold them. You could only shield it lightly against the wind and hope it didn't blow it all away leaving you behind breathless, aching, full of all the want of another person and what they put into your life.

Yes, in the presence of five such people, all shielding their lines from the winds of disaster, I did my very best to at least smile.

Friday afternoon rolled in and so did Mako's truck, honking up a storm so I'd hear it from the fifth floor. I said goodbye to the Caellums and joined Mako and Bolin for a half hour drive out of town to the flats.

From a distance we could see the canopy stretched across the only stage. It wasn't grand but bright green in color which made it stick out amongst the reds and browns of the dusty plain. The rolling dust was slowly encroaching on the nearby forest, snuffing out the undergrowth until only the toughest trees grew.

The woods had a parched look to them and all times of year you'd be snapping dead twigs of the trees as you walked by.

There was a kind of sad enthusiasm here of young people desperately trying to have fun. Everyone was holding clear plastic cups of a generic brand beer and I swear I've never seen this many pairs of daisy dukes and board shorts in my life.

The flimsy field of badly assembled tents stretched to the forest line and back towards the city, already now strong winds pelted the plains making the canvas whip and crack.

Somewhere a booth had been set up for people to weave their own hats and half the crowd were dragging trails of scratchy yellow straw behind them and sporting homemade airbrush tattoo's painted with 100% organic dye. There were bending arena's for the hopeful to test their potential against a junior varsity team. Bolin's eyes went wide with that but nobody else wanted to go in. We knew the team and they were good kids.

We set up our own tents and sat on the ground drinking until evening fell and Opal announced the music would begin anytime. None of us really considered socializing outside our group, we were already a mixed Teotech and RCCC after all. So we'd done our part there.

Asami had arrived with Opal and Kuvira. Her tent was tiny and she was very disappointed to find that the air mattress she'd insisted on bringing was so tall she inadvertently ended up with her face pressed against the tent ceiling when she finally managed to manhandle it inside.

We laughed a lot at that.

Somehow it didn't surprise me greatly that she hadn't given it a lot of thought. Opal and Kuvira gave her room in their tent. I don't think I've ever been more jealous in my life, to be quite honest.

Opal came stumbled out of camp and came back a bit later with a crummy looking guy, she waved me over and I realized he was some kind of drugdealer.

"They're legit. The purest you'll ever taste," the guy shot us a sleazy grin. Opal surveyed them knowingly, I had no idea what she thought she could learn from looking at five perfectly white pills stamped with the sigil of the air nation... Tenzin certainly didn't agree to that. I frowned at him.

"Hey, what's with this spiral?" I asked.

"You'll be gliding higher than an airbender if you try it, guaranteed," he replied.

I frowned deeper, Opal discreetly slipped him a thin stack of yuans and he handed her the pills.

"You should pick another symbol for your stuff, I don't wanna see these again," I warned him.

"Yeah yeah, take it up with human ressources lady, I don't make this stuff I just sell it," he spat, then disappeared back into the crowd with a shake of his head.

Kuvira patted my shoulder, "don't sweat it avatar."

Bolin bounced up to us, "I got the water you asked for," he shook the twelve pack of mineral water a few times. Opal showed him her closed hand, "And we have the party favors."

He grinned widely.

Asami was standing next to Mako, nervously rubbing her neck. He was frowning, but with Mako it's hard to say if that was because of anything that happened or just just his resting frown face. You'd have to be a psychic to know.

He took one look at our mischievous faces and announced he was going to the bathroom. Maybe he could pretend this wasn't happening if he didn't see us swallow them.

Opal passed the pills around. Ending at Asami who also had her hand out.

"You ever done this before?" Opal asked.

"No."

"Don't go wandering off, stay within sight of one of us," she said, pointing at our circle. Everyone looked ripe with anticipation.

"When do we take them?"

Opal checked her wristwatch, an old thing she won in some competition back in middle school. She could be really sentimental about those things. "The moment they announce Iroh the Second on the stage. Until then we hydrate."

Bolin passed out water bottles.

Thirty minutes and 5 separate trips to the bushes later the speakers crinkled with sound and a pleasant voice asked if we were ready. The crowd around the stage cheered and five eager university students brought a little white pill to their lips. Another 30 minutes passed and slowly a tingling feeling started in my toes and all the lights turned so very pretty.

Every step felt lighter as we made our way to the stage.

Then the music began, the bassline luring us to dance as our minds drifted away to new exciting places. I don't think I've ever been so _here_ and everywhere else at once. If that makes any sense.

 _Unce Unce Unce Unce Unce_

I felt hot, sweaty and completely frenzied by emotion.

My muscles twitched with the beat, and I couldn't stop tightening and loosening my muscles as I danced.

My mind felt eager to accommodate some sort of change, to explore and experience new things. I don't know if I've ever been more than I am right now.

Most people know that feeling of wanting change intimately, when the dullness of life settles upon you like a heavy oppressive cape and you are suddenly overwhelmed with need to shed it and just do something, anything, as long as it's new and exciting and totally world changing.

I have no doubt that it seems foolish to you but my state was not brought about by some immense spiritual journey or a noble attempt to better myself. It was instead shuddered into being by the rhythmic thump thump thump of the bassline and the fuzz growing in my mind. If this was what drugs was then I had to say I liked them.

At least this one.

I stomped my feet and raised my arms in the air.

Around me hundreds of people did the same. I could feel the blood rushing through them, the reverberating of our feet through the solid bedrock beneath us, the groaning growing pains of the forest beyond and the great rush of wind as if the entire sweating, writhing mass was breathing in unison.

Our feet ground up the hard baked dirt as we stomped and danced and jumped, making a literal cloud of fine red brown particles that clung and whirled with the crowd. We'd be covered in grit, brown and dirty but very very happy.

Asami was there, she had the same easy smile and mile-away eyes I saw everywhere around me. She grabbed my hand and pulled me close and we danced against each other, gazes locked, my hands on her hips and hers around my neck.

I could feel her naked skin under the tips of my fingers and it was scorching hot.

Her eyes were glistening and I saw the entire universe in them, a million galaxies twinkling in bright neon colors.

I leaned in and licked her bottom lip, I could taste the fine residue of dirt there. She laughed and bit mine in return, holding it between her teeth momentarily before releasing it into a grin.

I felt like we were about to kiss, then we didn't. I was flying backwards through the air for a moment, until I found my feet and started running. There was a sharp pain in my wrist and when I looked I saw Mako clasping my wrist in an iron grip.

"Ey ey ey, hey, Mako, hey. C'mon, find your chill dude. Whadda you doing?" I said.

"What does it look like? Saving you from making one hell of a mistake that's what."

I pouted, "I like making mistakes."

"Obviously."

We reached the tents and he guided me inside, took off my shoes and all but shoved me into my sleeping bag. If my mind hadn't grown a layer of soft bubblegum pink foam I would roar at the indignity of it but there was nothing there but compliance. Nothing but the throbbing idea breaking through that maybe, just maybe, kissing Asami Sato in front of her ex who happened to be my friend, wasn't such a good idea. That maybe I ought to think about that a little because I had this fucked up tendency to drive away people unless they were really tenacious and stuck around even when I was being distant and emotionally unavailable.

"Mako. Mako. It's gonna be so hard to dance in this." Was all I managed to say, it was a maybe-joke thought up by pink foam, not what I should be saying. Sorry Mako.

I reached over and fumbled around for a bottle of water from my bag. Mako watched me drink from the unopened bottle for more or less two minutes before sighing loudly and jerking it firmly out of my hand. He opened it and helped me drink, honestly, I was perfectly able to drink without his help.

"You're the dumbest kid I know," he said.

"Well you're no... brainy person, either." I mumbled, jabbing my finger at him.

He rolled his eyes and waited for me to go to sleep.

His hulking form was silhouetted against a sky lit all the colours of the rainbow and he looked very small and solemn and I couldn't help but feel so bad for how treated him. All because I was jealous he found Asami before I could and probably knew her so much better than she'd ever let me know her.

I'm sorry Mako.

When I woke up I saw he'd slept there, hunched over himself, his head down, guarding my open tent. There was a small skyline of empty bottles in my vision when I looked along the ground, same brand, all his. He must've been sitting there for hours looking over me. Which was impressive because I know he'd want to look after his brother and the rest of them while they were out there like that. Rolling their asses off and getting into who knows what trouble.

He was a good kid really.

Overprotective, surly and a royal pain in the ass though.

I pushed his limp body over and he awoke with a grunt, "Let's get everyone breakfast champ," I said and he gave me a bleary eyed look that kinda let me know exactly how tired he was of always looking after everyone all the time but he just couldn't help it either way.

We stood in line at the food tent for maybe half an hour and honestly even though the dirt was well, dirt, somewhere below all the trash and rattling beer cans and plastic cup tumbleweeds, we both really wanted to just lie down and sleep on it. Maybe the queue would just move over us so we wouldn't lose our spot.

People smelled like brown.

Earthy sweat, morning pee and bad breath.

And always of dirt.

We bought all the food. At least it felt like it.

My arms strained underneath the boxes.

I glanced over at Mako and he looked to be faring none better.

"Thanks though."

He lifted a ridiculous eyebrow, his dark eyes sizing me up. "For what?"

"Getting me into bed."

"Before you did something stupid."

I grimaced, "I don't think I can help myself with her."

"Neither could I. She is very beautiful."

"And smart."

He smiled, "yes, that too."

"I have a match tomorrow." I confessed.

"I know."

I exhaled sharply, "I'm not ready."

He looked like he was sizing me up again. One of the corners of his lips was pulled back in a sort-of smile, like he was finding me very amusing. I know he would have done some sort of ridiculous Tenzin worthy fatherly gesture if his hands hadn't been laden with food. Like placing his hand on my shoulders and bending down to look me straight in the eye, eyebrows knitted with concern. Give me a break.

He sighed, "you're always ready Korra." After another moment he gave me an uncertain smile, "just don't drink tonight, it really throws off your aim."

I nudged a pebble into his stomach.

"I've improved."

We both smiled at that.

 **A/N: I'm really sorry but there will be another near miss next chapter, I don't mean to create all this drama I just can't help it, consider this fair warning.**


End file.
